11/29/2009

Elizabeth Mitchell - Sci Fi Sexy Siren

Elizabeth Mitchell Lost V Revolution Huge Rack
Elizabeth Mitchell Lost V Revolution Huge Rack 
Elizabeth Mitchell, 39 years young blond vixen is very busy these days. She has a starring role on the ABC TV hit series Lost portraying Juliet Burke, a doctor with a secret past and a hell of a rack. Lost is a monumental hit for Elizabeth and ABC as well.

Adding to her hit series, she plays FBI agent Erica Evans in the ABC SciFi series, "V." She inadvertently discovers that the visitors from outer space are not the nice, friendly, and helpful type aliens, but an alien race set for world domination.

Elizabeth also played Julia Sullivan in the motion picture Frequency, a movie about a ham radio operator connecting with his dead father in the past to solve a murder spree that took place in the past.

Visit the rest of Elizabeth Mitchell's Movie And TV Appearances Here.


Sci-Fi Sexy Sirens brought to you by the Grassy Knoll Institute marketing team to boost readership and placement on search engines.



Lurking On The Grassy Knoll

11/27/2009

Black Friday Thought Screen Helmet

thought-screen-helmet-black-friday
Black Friday Thought Screen Helmet
Black Friday is a good day for aliens to abduct you. Be prepared!
For being a bad man, and not following the instructions causing the construction of an improper thought screen helmet, Billy banished Ned to the cornfield for good.

Disclaimer: Don't let what happened to Ned happen to you. Your lifestyle and job does not have to suffer from the fear of alien abduction. You can learn how to construct your very own authentic thought screen helmet lined with velostat (A magical material that cancels telepathic emissions) that will effectively eliminate 100% of the telepathic transmissions from the aliens attempting to control your thoughts. Don't be wished out to the corn field. Act today!


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/26/2009

Happy Thanksgiving From The Grassy Knoll

thanksgiving-catered-by-the-three-stooges
Happy Thanksgiving From The Knuckleheads Of The Grassy Knoll Institute

Happy Thanksgiving

From The Knuckleheads Of The Grassy Knoll Institute

Any brave souls venturing out on Black Friday, the kick-off of the Christmas retail season tomorrow?


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/15/2009

Heaven Or Hell In Gatlinburg


Saw this sign on a car on the Parkway in Gatlinburg, Tennessee recently. I pondered a moment and thought...

A far better question is, What the Hell is Lady Gaga? Depending on the answer, it could be Heaven or Hell. Or both!


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/12/2009

Half A Century Old Today

Yes, that's me, just a couple of days ago, sitting on a tomb in the cemetery enjoying the uncharacteristically beautiful warm November weather. On my 50th birthday, I came to the realization that I have had gray hair for half of my life. Yes, I have been gray since I turned 25. (For those of you not doing the math) I also realized that I have been married for half of my life.

To be honest, I am the luckiest guy in the world. (I know that sounds cliché, but in my case, it's totally accurate) My wife Patty is my soul mate and the most wonderful and beautiful woman I could ever imagine. (And I had a thing for super model Christy Brinkley!)

My son Patrick and I were talking just the other day and the topic moved to what life was like back when I was a child. (You know, in the Dark ages!) (Patrick is a hell of a son. He has his grandfather Jacks work ethic. He has a big heart and I am very proud of him.)

I replied: Before I was gray, I jumped roof to roof from neighborhood houses. I climbed flag poles just to reach the top. I hitched rides on trains just to see where they were going. I would play baseball, football, and basketball all day and capture the flag and flashlight tag at night. I would ride my bike to Idora Park and ride the Wild Cat roller coaster.

Before I was gray, telephones had rotary dials. And were connected to a phone cable. Entering area codes were only necessary when dialing long distance. Prefix numbers, (The first three digits of your phone number) didn't need to be dialed either, you merely told the operator that was on the line that you wanted Riverside and the last four digits of the number and the operator would connect you. Cell phones were only worn by Dick Tracy.

Before I was gray, Television pictures were black and white. Only the rich had color pictures. Televisions only had three channels. ABC, CBS, and NBC. Those were the only letters you needed to know. Televisions had names like Admiral, Curtis-Mathis, Motorola, Philco, Zenith, Sylvania, Westinghouse, and RCA. The remote control was the youngest child. VCR's were science fiction. Imagine being able to watch Gun Smoke any time you wanted to. Television broadcasts usually signed off the air after the 11 O'clock news with a somber rendition of God Bless America. Johnny Carson was the king of late night. Nothing better than Ed Ames and the Tomahawk incident. Google it.

Before I was gray, the Internet was a misspelling for Interstate. Computers were as big as houses. Floppies were girls not wearing their bra's. Surfing involved water, waves, and a flat board resembling an ironing board. You had to go to the public library for research. Porn came in magazines, from seedy side stores and sold by a cigar smoking man in a ripped dirty t-shirt. National Geographic magazine was always the fall back source for porn. You were grateful to see a glimpse of Playmates nether regions, but only from afar.

Before I was gray, the British invaded the United States and Americans loved it. The Beatles stormed the country rising to the top of Billboards top 40 chart. We bought single 45 records and rarely listened to the "B" side. The record covers were pieces of art work. With lyrics enclosed. The 8-Track player was all the rage. We knew when playing certain Beatle songs backwards special messages and clues could be heard. "I'm buried" was one of them.

I was born in 1959, right before the Kennedy administration came into power. The population of the world has more than doubled since I was born. Minimum wage was $1 dollar an hour. Nixon was Vice President. There were only 48 states. Alaska and Hawaii joined later in the year. Stamps cost 4 cents.

On the tube, Bonanza debuted, in living color. Rod Serlings science fiction series, The Twilight Zone scared the Hell out of viewers.

Pornography entered the mainstream of society as Playboy was first published with blond bombshell actress Marilyn Monroe as the first centerfold.

Speaking of porn, the Barbie doll was introduced in 1959. And remember the Frisbee? Introduced in 1959 by Wham-O. (Wake me up before you go go!!!)

Turning to sports, The Dodgers won the World Series and the Baltimore Colts the National Football Championship.

At the movies, Gigi won best picture of 1959. Tony Curtis won best actor.

February 2nd, 1959, was the day the music died. Buddy Holly, Richie Valens, and the Big Bopper, died in a plane crash after a concert.

Famous people born in 1959, other than me of course:

Linda Blair, The Exorcist star.

Keith Olbermann, broadcaster, They're not gonna get him.

Cris Collinsworth, Bengals receiver and broadcaster.

Lawrence taylor, linebacker from the Giants.

John McEnroe, Tennis ace.

Danny Bonaduce, Danny Partridge, from the TV series.

Jessica Hahn, political sex scandal queen.

Magic Johnson, NBA star for the Lakers.

Simon Cowell, American Idol judge.

Marie Osmond, half of Utah's first couple.

Royalty Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York.

weird Al Yankovic. Musical artist mastering in parodies.

Mackenzie Phillips, famous for sleeping with her father.

Val Kilmer, Ice and Batman.

They say 50 is the new 40. I received my application for my AARP card in the mail the other day. WTF! However, I am 50 years old. Fifty years! It seems like only yesterday Patty and I were walking over the bridge in Mill Creek Park, the day I proposed to her, and she said yes. I am looking forward to the next 50 years. Please come back and visit me then and read my centennial post.

I'll leave you with a song written and performed by Robert Lamm from the band Chicago. Its titled, Beginnings. And that is what being 50 means to me. Only the beginning....

When I'm with you,
It doesn't matter where we are.
Or what we're doing,
I'm with you, that's all that matters.

Time passes much too quickly,
When we're together laughing.
I wish I could sing it to you, oh no,
I wish I could sing it to you.

Mostly I'm silent, mm-hm-hm-hm.. Silent,
Never think of the right words to say.
When I kiss you, I feel a thousand different feelings,
The color of chills all over my body, hey, hey, hey.

And when I feel them,
I quickly try to decide which one,
I should try to put into words,
Oh no, try to put into words.

Mostly I'm silent, Silent.
Silent...

Only the beginning of what I want to feel forever,
Yeah, oh, oh, whoa,
Yes, only the beginning of what I want to feel forever,
Only the beginning, only just the start, yeah.
I've got to get you into my life mama,
I've got to get you next to me.
Only the beginning, only just the start,
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah...Mmm-hmmm...


Only the beginning...Only the beginning...


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/11/2009

Smoky Mountain Brewery Chicken Tenders

Fresh Warm Rolls
If you read my Diner critiques, (And shame on you if you do not) then The Smoky Mountain Brewery restaurant on the Parkway in Gatlinburg, Tennessee is no stranger. Tonight's offering was a simple choice, and with the restaurant crowded but not over flowing, we were seated quickly and positioned our table to the TV with the football game of our choice.

Our waitress was bubbly and took our drink and dinner order and in a short time, rolls and drinks were at our table. The rolls were hot, fresh, and tasted very good. Of course they tasted home made, not known if they actually were, but tasted so.
Brewery Chicken Tenders
My order was a chage up from the standard menu. I ordered the chicken planks and a baked potato with butter. I saw an order of chicken go to a table next to us and they looked delicious. A few minutes later, my eyes were correct.

The chicken was hot, fresh, juicy, the batter spicy enough and cooked golden brown to almost perfection. The taste, delicious.

The baked potato was hot, well cooked, and completed the meal. A cold diet Coke was a refreshing addition to the meal.

The portion was adequate, not to much, not to little. the meal was filling and I left felling full but not bloated.

The cost was reasonable, $13 dollars before tip. Yes, only $13 dollars.

The Grassy Knoll Diner scores 4 out of 5 shots and recommends Smoky Mountain Brewery in Gatlinburg for dinner.




LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


Responses to “Smoky Mountain Brewery Chicken Tenders”


  1. Enis74 said

    Now thats a whole lot of fried food. Fried chicken in the south, thats not surprising, the baked potato is whats surprising. They should be fries or biscuits and gravy.

  2. Gumby said

    When in Rome, do as the Romans do.

  3. Moominboy said

    Looks very nice. I actually prefer cooked, baked or mashed potatoes to fries but I didn’t see many places in U.S. offering them. Good to know they are still around.

11/06/2009

Original Thought Screen Helmet Wearers

Protection Against Telepathic Aliens - Not Rulers
The Grassy Knoll Institute has long suspected that Catholic nuns were the original target of the evil race of aliens stealing and controlling our very thoughts. The aliens plan was to control the nuns that teach and shape the children of the world and make the nuns cruel and abusive to the children.

However, due to a unique Catholic nun habit design, (The ergonomic curve of the habit bounces back the telepathic waves) the evil aliens telepathic rays become erratic and interrupted leaving the nuns non-influenced in any way by the aliens.

If this is true, then what excuse do the Nuns have now!!
Disclaimer: It is not a known fact if Catholic nuns habits are lined with velostat material or not.



LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/04/2009

V - The Visitors - Sexy Aliens

Giant Aliens Fingers Cut Off
Giant Aliens Fingers Cut Off 
The Grassy Knoll Institute was not fooled by the 29 giant alien space ships hovering over the worlds major cities last night at 8pm Eastern Standard Time. We knew straight away (We're rocket scientists) that the sexy alien spouting eternal peace and health to all was all a ruse. We know for a fact that the Visitors are an alien race bent on the obliteration of the human race and enslaving the survivors to a lifetime of servitude to the whims of Anna and her cohorts.

Last week, in the wooded area of Spokane, Washington, the Grassy Knoll Institute captured a sleeper cell V alien. During a fierce battle the V's fingers were cut off as it was performing a patented Three Stooges eye poke maneuver. (Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk) Before the V alien died, it spilled its guts revealing the plan of annihilation to humankind.


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL