1/03/2017

Flapjacks Pancakes - Gatlinburg



In Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge there are more than enough restaurants to eat breakfast at. Problem is, they are busy all the time. Flapjacks on the Parkway was no exception but they had a good system that kept customers happy.

On our way to Pigeon Forge, we stopped at Flapjacks for breakfast. The parking lot was crowded but the restaurant was large, much larger than the Flapjacks in the heart of Gatlinburg.

We walked in and we were greeted by the hostess asking how many. We answered two. She said it would be about 10-15 minutes. No problem at all.

In less than 10 minutes our name was called and we were seated. Our waitress appeared and asked for our drinks and promptly returned with them.

I order the Wonderland Egg Breakfast for $9.49. It consisted of three eggs, with bacon, sausage, home fries, and two good sized pancakes.

In less than ten minutes our breakfast was served. And it was good. Real Good. My eggs well cooked as well as the bacon and sausage. The home fries were very tasty and the pancakes, or flapjacks, were delicious.

Great service, great food, great value.

The Grassy Knoll Institute scores 5 out of 5 shots and recommends Flapjacks for breakfast. 

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/16/2016

The Mystique Of Jennifer Lawrence


Jennifer Lawrence, born in Kentucky on August 15th, 1990 is a 26 year old Mega-Movie Star. Lawrence has won an Academy Award for best actress, (The second youngest to ever win the award) plus multiple Golden Globes during her impressive film career. And she is just beginning. Her newest blockbuster, Passengers (A space seed type space ship on a 120 year journey carrying passengers cryogenic sleep pods. Hers malfunctions and she and another find themselves trapped on the ship for another 90 years) Debuts December 21st. Get in line early.

Not only does this movie land Lawrence on the Sci-Fi Sexy Sirens list, but her list of other science fiction movies lands her a first class ticket.

X-Men - First Class
The Hunger Games
The Hunger Games - Catching Fire
X-Men - Days Of Future Past
The Hunger Games - Mockingjay 1 and 2
X-Men - Apocalypse
The Passengers

Sci-Fi Sexy Sirens brought to you by the Grassy Knoll Institute marketing team to boost readership and placement on search engines.


Lurking On The Grassy Knoll

12/14/2016

Dicks Last Resort - Gatlinburg



We stopped for lunch on a busy day in Gatlinburg. We had eaten at Dicks Last Resort before so we knew the atmosphere going in. It was such a nice day we asked to be seated outside. Our waiter said, "I don't care, sit wherever you want." It had begun.

In short order our waiter returned and asked what we wanted. We aksed for cokes and we ordered our meals. He wroye it down and then threw half a dozen straws on our table and said, "Here, I'll be back. Maybe!" He did return with our drinks and sized us up and informed us he'd be right back again.

While we were waiting for our lunch our waiter came back with several large white sheets of paper. he proceeded to write something on each and folded them into the signature "Dick Hats." He placed mine on my head and one on my wife's head. He sneered at us, chuckled, and left. (Check the photos below for our dick hats)

Our lunch was brought out and our waiter placed, or well, sort of tossed our lunch on the table. He said, "There you go!"

I ordered a bacon cheeseburger with fries. The burger was well cooked, the bun fresh and not soggy, the cheese melted and the bacon cooked and not chewy. The fries were there, not many, but they were adequate. The burger however tasted very good.

Our waiter came back to check on us several times to check on us and throw out a few one liners at us as he refilled our cokes and checked if everything was OK. It was.

All in all, we got off easy. Lunch must be really tame for the time we went in the evening, it was rowdy as all H.E. double hockey sticks.

I recommend Dicks Last Resort, but only if you have a good sense of humor. It was a fun time had by all.


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/12/2016

Genesis Versus The Big Bang Theory

Explaining the mysteries of science by reading the bible
Part One:
Genesis Versus The Big Bang Theory
Let me get right to the crux of this intense ongoing debate between the scientific community and the religious community with this simple statement. The Big Bang Theory and the Book Of Genesis are one in the same. That's right folks, both beliefs  conclude with the same final result. (I will just let that sink in for a moment or two, or three.) (I am not referring to the Star Trek Genesis episode nor the CBS hit comedy, The Big Bang Theory)
Also, let me state that I am a born and raised Roman Catholic, educated in the 1960's at a Catholic school. (With mean nasty Nuns) I understand and agree that evolution and the natural selection of species is correct. I also understand and agree that the Earth is billions of years old, not the 5-7 thousand years old some religious communities believe. Mother nature is more than a woman tasting butter. Things happen for a reason. The sun rises and sets, and the Earth is not the center of the universe. Nor is it flat.
This will not become a science versus religion debate but merely an attempt to offer a new path for both concepts. To perhaps think outside of each beliefs rigid system.

Let us begin:
Creation:
What was the catalyst that created the universe?
Scientific Community Belief:
The scientific community state that in the beginning, before there was a universe, there was a mass of extreme dense energy. Roughly 14 billion years ago, an unknown catalyst caused the mass of extreme energy to detonate and rapidly expand creating matter and the elements of the known universe. From the initial "Big Bang" the universe continued to expand evolving into stars, planets, solar systems, and galaxies. This was billions of years in the making to finally arrive at the present where humankind exists. The universe continues to expand and age as we live and breathe.
Religion Belief:
If you look closely at the holy bible and read Genesis, it expresses the same story of the Big Bang theory. (Now hold on just a minute, don't go yelling and tossing things at the computer screen) Seriously, it does. Genesis begins, In the beginning, there was nothingness, emptiness, only God existed. God then created the heavens and the earth, day and night, the sea, the land, the fish, animals, birds, and finally man and woman. God said onto man, be fruitful and multiply. God did all this in only six days. On the seventh day, He rested. The catalyst was God. God created the universe.
Both stories are eerily similar. (Extreme energy being the catalyst for the scientific community and God being the catalyst for the religious belief) However, there are two nagging variances that separate the scientific community and the religious community. These two variances are: Time, as in, the amount of time it took to create the universe, and second, God versus the extreme energy.
So let us look at time. We, as an educated race of beings believe we understand time in our plane of existence. One day equals 24 hours. Thirty days equals one month. One thousand years equals a millennium. Our science proves the universe is roughly 14 billion years old. Using that logic backed by science, a mere six days Genesis speaks of to create the universe is pure poppycock. Or is it?
The Book of Genesis indeed offers a much shorter timeline. Six days compared to 14 billion years. This is where science gets the better of us. When theologians and scientists attempt to understand the mystery of God, the supreme being, or whatever you may want to call Him, Her, It, our feeble minds cannot comprehend creation concepts.
Genesis states that God was floating in the void and created the universe and the earth on day one. Then the day and night, then the waters, fish, animals, and man. All in six days. To understand Genesis you have to ask yourself a question. How does God measure a day? To a supreme being that always was and always shall be, perhaps one day equals billions of years. So, in God's perspective, 6 days may equal 12 billion years. Add in the two billion years for the one day God rested on day 7 and it equals 14 billion years. The same amount of time for Genesis and the Big Bang.
Point Of Parliamentary Procedure:
Thousands of years ago, humankind could not comprehend an enormous time line such as 14 billion years. It would have to be explained in a manner that would be understood. Humankind would have no concept in a measurement of time consisting of 14 billion years. However, they would certainly understand 6 days. 

 Another example: In the 1700's, no human could comprehend a trillion dollar debt, or an individual being a billionaire. Today, these terms are not only understandable, but commonplace. Time must be put into perspective just as everything else. 

I recall one humorous movie, Austin Powers, where the villain of the movie, Doctor Evil, was awoken from the 1960's and found himself in the modern world.  He promptly put the world in peril and ransomed the world for (One Million Dollars.....) The leaders of the world laughed at the minuscule amount.

So in essence,  the bible took some liberties to explain how long it took for God to create the universe to allow comprehension. 
Now we can agree both stories have correct time lines. Both roughly stating 14 billion years. All we have to do now is figure out the Energy versus God problem.
Energy Versus God:
Scientific Community Belief:
The Big Bang Theory is predicated on the belief that at one time before the universe existed, a mass of unknown energy exploded and formed the universe as we know it. In the beginning, there was nothing, and then, there was something accelerating faster than the speed of light breaking several laws of physics along the way. (I think I saw this sleight of hand trick in Las Vegas at the Penn And Teller show) 

No one really knows where that unknown mass came from or how it ignited and exploded. They just believe it did because it is the logical thought process.
Religious Community Belief:
The belief is, in the beginning, there was nothingness, only God. Then God created the universe. The mass of energy was God. God created the mass, and with his power, ignited the creation of the universe as we know it. 

No one really knows where God came from or how he became into existence. They just believe he was and always will be because it is their belief. 
Conclusion:
In essence, if you believe in the Big Bang Theory, you believe in God. If you believe in God, you also believe in the Big Bang Theory.

I could be wrong. This is after all, the home of the 99 cent news story. Bazinga!




LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/05/2016

Timberwood Grill -The Island



Patty and I went to "The Island" located in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee for the day. At lunch we were starving. We spotted the Timberwood Grill and quickly agreed upon lunch.

Let me say the service was fantastic, the waitress friendly and efficient. Our order was taken and our drinks brought to our table. We opted for outside on this pleasantly warm October day.

In short order, our lunch was brought out. The bacon cheeseburger was fantastic. Again, fantastic. It tasted amazing. Was well cooked. Bun fresh and good. Bacon plenty and crisp. Cheese melted.

Cost was very cheap. about $12 dollars without tip.

I highly recommend Timberwood Grill at the Island.


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/30/2016

Rachel Nichols - Star Trek Orion Slave Girl

rachel-nichols-orion-slave-girl

Rachel Nichols, 36 years young, born in the state of Maine is our new Sci-Fi Sexy Siren.
Rachel has appeared in Conan The Barbarian, the remake of The Amityville Horror, as an Orion Slave Girl (Pictured Above) in Star Trek - Into Darkness and of course as most of us know her from, Kiera Cameron, the time traveling cop in the series Continuum.

Rachel also stars in a new science fiction movie released in 2016 titled Pandemic.

In other related news, the Grassy Knoll Institute has it on good authority that Nichols will be joining TAPS next year in a rebooted series Ghost Hunters with Jason Hawes. Rachel will be part of a new paranormal investigating team visiting allegedly haunted establishments across the country.

Sci-Fi Sexy Sirens brought to you by the Grassy Knoll Institute marketing team to boost readership and placement on search engines.

Lurking On The Grassy Knoll

11/10/2016

Celebrities Leaving Country If Trump Wins

All my bags Are Packed, 
I'm ready to go, 
I'm standing here outside your door,
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye.

The presidential election is over and Donald Trump is now President-Elect. Love him or hate him, come this January 20th, 2017, Trump will be sworn in as the 45th president of these great United States. But this post isn't about Trump or Clinton. It is about the public figures who went on record stating they would leave the country if Donald Trump captured the election.

The clock is ticking. In a mere 71 days it will be time to put your money where your mouth is. The Grassy Knoll Institute will chart each public figures departure date and destination country. This will be updated weekly until everyone on the list las left the country.

* Neve Campbell - 12/01/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Radio silence.

* Cher - 12/01/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not leave)
Destination Country: Radio silence

* Bryan Cranston - 11/10/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Cranston reverses course and now sincerely wishes Trump success as president.

* Miley Cyrus - 11/12/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country:Miley stated that she doesn't say things she doesn't mean. Then how do you explain your statement before Trump was elected Miley?

* Lena Dunham - 11/12/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Dunham is upset people are now calling her out for her statement that she will leave for Canada if Trump wins. 

* Whoopie Goldberg - 11/11/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Goldeberg stated that it was all a misunderstanding she would leave if Trump won. 

* Chelsea Handler - 11/14/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Handler is now staying. Trump wins Chelsea. 

* Samuel L. Jackson - 11/13/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Jackson stated he pays more taxes than Trump and why is everyone in a hurry for him to leave. Sam, I have to ask, whats in your wallet? Plane Tickets?

* Keegan-Michael Key -
Departure Date:
Destination Country:

* George Lopez:-
Departure Date:
Destination Country:

* Ne-Yo -
Departure Date:
Destination Country:

* Amy Schumer - 11/13/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Amy now claims after the election that hey, it was all in jest. I didn't really mean I would leave the country.

* Al Sharpton - 11/10/2016
Departure Date: DNL (Did Not Leave)
Destination Country: Al said he was just kidding. It was all in jest. He is not leaving. 

* John Stewart -
Departure Date:
Destination Country:

* Barbara Streisand -
Departure Date:
Destination Country:

* Ali Wentworth -
Departure Date:
Destination Country:

Are there any more celebrities that were left out. Add them in the comments section.



LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/09/2016

Empirical Proof Aliens Are Controlling Government

Attention Citizens Of Earth.

Cause: Removing your tin foil thought screen helmet before the presidential election. 

Effect: Donald Trump wins the presidential election.

Results: Empirical proof that a race of evil aliens are controlling our government.



LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/04/2016

Ben And Jerrys Ice Cream - Gatlinburg



This first November week in Gatlinburg has been very warm. Hence, the need for ice cream. Ben abd Jerrys is right on the Parkway and was just a short walk from the convention center.

I walked in and ordered two scoops of mint chocolate chip in a cup. At first I thought the employee was making a mistake as he scooped out my ice cream. It looked like vanilla ice cream. I told him I thought mint chocolate chip was green. He smiled and said that Ben and Jerrys do not add any artificial coloring to their ice cream and I was getting the flavor I ordered.

He handed me the cup and I went to the cashier. The cost for two scoops was $5.46 with tax. I tossed the 54 cents into the tip jar and made my way to a bench on the parkway.

I must say, the ice cream was delicious. And frozen, not mushy like some other retailers hand out. The Grassy Knoll Institute scores 4 out 5 shots with a one shot deduction for the price.


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

11/02/2016

Vikings Have A New Offensive Coordinator - Now What

Today, it was announced that offensive coordinator Norv Turner resigned from the Minnesota Vikings. After two and a half seasons with the team, the offense is ranked 31st out of 32 teams. Pat Shurmur has been promoted to replace him. Shurmur and the Vikings face the Detroit Lions this coming Sunday in a NFC North clash.

Turners exit is one of many the Vikings have had to endure this season. Beginning with Teddy Bridgewater, starting quarterback, suffered a severe knee injury during practice just days before the regular season was to begin. If that wasn't bad enough, Adrian Peterson, NFL rushing leader in 2015 and arguably the best running back on the field, went down in week two with a knee injury. Add left tackle Kalil and a horde of other starters both on offense and defense left the team thin at depth.

In related news, Maytag also reported several repairmen have resigned and are now employed by the Vikings.

So now what?

Shurmur knows offense and he knows Sam Bradford, the quarterback the Vikings traded for with the Eagles eight days before the season started for a hefty price of next years first round draft pick. These are the predictions I forsee for the upcoming Lions game and future games going forward.

Leading rusher for the Vikings this Sunday: Cordarrlle Patterson. Patterson is the kick return man and part receiver but come Sunday he will lead the team in rushing. shurnurs scheme will have Patterson in motion looping behind Bradford when in the shotgun formation. This will keep at least one defensive player from targeting only Bradford. Patterson will also line up in the split back formation as well. Patterson will get the ball half a dozen times and have success in moving the chains.

Shurmur will also deploy a fast passed no huddle offense with quick hit passes to avoid Bradford from getting sacked. Rookie Treadwell will debut and be utilized in short passes across the middle. These changes will be enough to keep the Lions at bay and off balance just enough to score enough points to win.

Vikings win 23-16 Sunday.

On a sidenote: If you need a good washer or dryer, you know who to call.

SKOL VIKINGS!
minnesota vikings icon

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/31/2016

Last Halloween Post 2016

Happy Halloween From The Grassy Knoll Institute
Happy Halloween to all the faithful readers of the Grassy Knoll Institute. (And the unfaithful ones as well) Hopefully you enjoyed the bevy of beauties in our sexy Halloween costumes, bumper crop of Halloween melons, humorous Halloween tales, haunted attractions critiques, and all other things Halloween. I truly appreciate your patronage and comments through all these years. 

The blogging landscape has shifted dramatically over the past five years as more viable options such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc, has risen to popularity leaving many people abandoning their own blog and blogging social circle.

The Grassy Knoll Institute team has decided to stick around awhile longer. Perhaps, just perhaps, like the picture above, we will be the sole surviving blog from the old Geocities, Xanga, Xoom, Live Journal, Usenet, Vox, Home Builders, Yahoo Groups, Modblog, Home hosted site on Go Daddy, Wordpress, assorted platforms I have forgotten about, and of course Blogspot. (All of which the Grassy Knoll Institute published an iteration of on said platforms)

We started the Grassy Knoll Institute in 1995 (21 years for those keeping score) as an entertaining way for my son (Lead Scientist) and myself to learn the art of HTML coding. It took hours to create the first page with many a trial and error until we finally pushed the published button and the President Kennedy Assassination Conspiracy Theory appeared on our Gateway 2000 computer.

To us, it has been a wild ride as millions of viewers have visited our little slice of oddity on the Internet. We hope we have entertained you throughout the years and hope to continue into the future. And.... My ABC Lost theory was correct by the way.....

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


Jessica Nigri - Best Halloween Melons 2016

Jessica Nigri - Best Halloween Melons
Winner of the 2016 Dark Zone Halloween Melons is none other than Jessica Nigri.

In just one of her many Halloween costumes, Jessica portrays a sexy female Freddie Kreuger. Visit her Instagram page to see more unbelievable costumes. Jessica Nigri Instagram.


Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Best Group Halloween Costume 2016

Taste-The-Rainbow-Best-Group-Halloween-Costume-2016
Taste The Rainbow - Best Group Halloween Costume 2016. 
Winner Of The 2016 Best Group Halloween Costume:

The Skittles Candy Girls - Taste The Rainbow!
This is not only the best group Halloween costume of 2016, butt the best in the history of the Halloween Dark Zone.

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/30/2016

Youngstown Ohio Zombie Crawl 2016


Saturday night, October 29th was the annual Youngstown, Ohio Zombie Crawl. Zombies arrived at the B andO Station and at 6pm sharp performed the Thriller Dance.

After the dance, the zombie horde gathered and crawled up the Peanut bridge. It was a perfect night. The sky clear with no rain and temperatures in the low 70's.

Enjoy the zombie crawl.

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

And Now A Word From Our Sponsors

Zom "B" Gone Cleaner
During the Zombie Apocalypse spills and stains (Especially blood and guts) are going to occur. 
You now have a defense the next time zombies break down your door and leave a trail of entrails all over your newly vacuumed living room carpet. 

Step One: Kill the zombie(s) inside your house. 
Step two: Remove said zombie(s) from your house keeping care not to allow more zombies to enter. 
Step three: Spray a generous amount of Zom B Gone on the stain(s) on the carpet and allow the cleansing enzymes to activate.
Step Four: While waiting for the enzymes to activate, reload your gun(s) or sharpen your blade(s) in anticipation of the next zombie attack. 
Step Five: Vacuum affected (Infected) area. Let dry before you walk on the carpet.
Step Six: Repeat Steps one through five. 

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/29/2016

Ripleys Haunted Adventure 2016 - Gatlinburg


Ripley's Haunted Adventure is located on the Parkway in Gatlinburg, Tennessee.It is a very popular haunt during the month of October. I visited this haunt several times before but never in the month of October. Until this year.

Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in the month of October, at 6PM sharp, Ripley's has their own version of a zombie crawl. A horde of monsters appear and parade down the Parkway ending up in front of the Haunted Adventure. The monsters interact with the people on the street. After about 20 minutes, the monsters filter into the haunt and add to the excitement and fright.

We bought our tickets earlier in the day to avoid the long line to buy in the evening. When puchasing the tickets, you will be given many ticket options. The packages all include the Aquarium plus the other Ripley attractions in the city. If you are planning on staying for several days and want to sample the Ripleys attraction, buying the package is a good idea. We opted for the $1 off per person coupon we found in one of the many coupons books throughout the Parkway.

There were about 100 people in line when we got to Ripleys right before 6pm. We filmed the monster parade as the Ripley monsters walked up the street and interwacted with the crowd of people that had gathered.

After a short wait, less than twenty minutes, it was now our time to step into the rickety old cage that takes it's paying customers (Victims) to the top of the haunt. It is a very effective prop. Very loud, old, looks unsafe, and has a hint of danger to it. We met a crazy man at the top. I was informed that my camera must be turned off at this point. I obliged.

The haunt is a self guided tour. We were in a group of six people. I was the lead, my wife Patty behind me, the others behind her. We were instructed to put our hand on the persons back in front of us. A few seconds later we began our march through the haunt.

I will say the haunt is much larger than what it looks like from the outside. There were many rooms inside to navigate through. The props and graphics were above average and the actors were well trained and effective. This haunt was all about misdirection.

After about 30 minutes, we found our way out. We stepped into the elevator and.... I won't spoil it for you.

One thing I didn't like about this haunt. Outside while we were waiting in line, a woman was selling fiber optic lights to help you see in the haunt. She said it was absolutely necessary to see inside the haunt for it was pitch black inside. The lights, (Which were throw away quality) cost five dollars. I noticed that if you bought the lights at the ticket box office, they were only $2 dollars. Whip a rip off. I declined to buy the light. The woman selling them told me I would be sorry.

I was not. At no time did I ever need the fiber optic light. DO NOT BUY THE LIGHT! IT IS A RIP OFF. The rest of the haunted adventure was very entertaining and enjoyable. It was actually fun. We recommend it in the month of October.

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/28/2016

Breast Zombie Makeup

The Halloween Dark Zone Breast Best Zombie Makeup Award goes to Seatbelt Susie. The makeup is spot on. From the red colored eyes, to the dark dead eye shadow, to the amazing artistry and makeup on her mouth to off course her breasts. The whole team wins.

Halloween Tip: Always wear your seatbelt, even if you are on a short journey. It may just save your life. Even during the Zombie Apocalypse.

Folks, Seatbelt Susie was not wearing her seatbelt. Perhaps that is how she became a zombie.

Happy Halloween


LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL