Lost Update: Season 6 Preview - Faith Of The Heart

Lost Update - Season Six - 01/27/2010

It's been a long road, getting from there to here.
It's been a long time, but my time is finally near.
And I will see my dream come alive at last. I will touch the sky.
And they're not gonna hold me down no more, no they're not gonna change my mind.

Cause I've got faith of the heart.
I'm going where my heart will take me.
I've got faith to believe. I can do anything.
I've got strength of the soul. And no one's gonna bend or break me.
I can reach any star.
I've got faith.
I've got faith, faith of the heart.

Five and a half years ago, September 22nd, 2004, I watched the pilot of ABC's new drama series, Lost. It was about a horrific plane crash that went down 1000 miles off course stranding 48 survivors. To make matters worse, the Losties encountered a terrifying invisible monster stalking the survivors. The program was very entertaining but something just didn't jive and some scenes were all to familiar. At that moment, I formulated my Lost theory and posted it to my  Grassy Knoll blog. Week in and week out for the past 5 years I updated each episode with what was really going on behind the scene. In May of 2010, we shall see if the Curator was correct.

Just what is the Grassy Knoll Institutes Lost theory….I’ve been waiting six years to tell you…..
Although it appears the survivors of Oceanic flight 815 are on a tropical island, they are being deceived. There is no island. The survivors are in a virtual reality laboratory. All the castaways are interconnected to one another sharing each others thoughts, memories, and feelings. While in this virtual reality laboratory, a battery of physical and mental experiments are performed on them. And who is running these experiments? As Juliet stated, the Aliens of course.

Season Six, the final season, promises to answer the countless questions the show produced. However, the writers stated that not every single question will be given an answer, but will attempt to tie as many loose ends up as possible at the conclusion of the series. The Grassy Knoll Institute feels the following questions need to be answered to satisfy the millions of loyal Lost fans.

* Where are we? Charlie asked that question in the pilot after the smoke monster made it's first appearance. We've been trying to figure that out since.

* When are we? Time travel was introduced and the castaways have been transported to the 1950's, 1970's, the present, whenever that is, and to the future.

* Who are we? A very select group of survivors all with a backstory and all connected to one another in varying degrees.

* Where did all the children go? Ben took them in a raid and we never saw them again.

* Why did they take the children? For what purpose.

* What do the numbers mean? 4 - 8 - 15 - 16 - 23 - 42
They appear everywhere and have some sort of significant meaning.

* What is the Hanso corporation? It was mentioned early on but forgotten as of late.

* What is the real objective of the Dharma Initiative? To save the world, or perhaps to end it.

* Why are people who are known to be dead still appear and interact with the living on and off the island? It gives new meaning to the phrase, I see dead people?

* Who is Jacob? Is he the mastermind behind everything, or merely just another chess piece in the Lost Game.

* Who is the mysterious MIB? And why does he despise Jacob so much.

* How is it possible that John Locke can walk on the island? He was wheel chair bound but after the crash, he turns into Tarzan.

* Who is Ben really? Just an evil man, or a man wanting to save the world.

* Why doesn't Richard age like the rest of the Others? He was around in the 1950's and didn't age a bit in the present and the future.

* How can Desmond see glimpses of the future?

* How did Charlie kick his heroin habit so quickly?

* What is the significance of the Ying/Yang Black/White comparisons? is it a struggle between good and evil.

* Why can't the island be spotted by the air or from the sea?

* What is the significance of the black powder creating a ring around Jacob's cabin in the woods?

* Why don't they show Juliet's rack more often? The ratings would soar even higher.

And literally hundreds of more questions waiting to be answered.

February 2nd, is the premiere of season six. I believe this episode will recap several plot lines of previous seasons and then focus on the end game of the series. We will begin to see very soon where the storyline is headed and how Lost will end and who will be left standing. Alive or dead! I anticipate questions to be answered at a quick pace, not rapid fire, but narrowing the arc's of each character. There has been 5 seasons of episodes, the writers have only 16 episodes to tie it all together before the finale airs in May.

What questions do you want answered by the writers and producers of the show before the series ends? The comments are open, what say you Lost faithful?

Back To Lost Theories Archives

LURKING, STILL LOST ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Another Reason To Hate Catholic Nuns

Another Reason To Hate Nuns

The Minnesota Vikings, (My team) lost the NFC championship game Sunday to the New Orleans Saints. And these sons-of-bitches nuns are smiling and carrying on after the game like they just got to kiss the Popes ring.

I will exact revenge!!!

Back To Catholic Nun Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Thought Screen Helmet Listening Device

Thought Screen Helmet Listening Device

In an attempt to collect vital information on the evil race of space aliens controlling a small population of people through telepathy, the Grassy Knoll Institute scientists have engineered a device they call a reverse thought screen helmet. Unlike other thought screen helmets, this device intercepts the telepathic commands of the aliens, and with the help of velostat, a magical material with telepathic blocking properties, filters, processes, and records them. The data is then sent to the secret laboratory of the Grassy Knoll Institute to decipher the encrypted messages.

The latest message decoded: Lady Gaga is a man. Now the world knows where that rumor began. With the evil race of space aliens. More messages will be revealed as soon as they are deciphered.

Back To Thought Screen Helmet Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Catholic Nun Mafia

I'm Funny How

Patrick: You're funny!
Sister Tommasina Devito: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
Patrick: Just... you know, how you tell the story, what?
Sister Tommasina Devito: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How am I funny, what is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!

The Nun Mafia, a little known Catholic church faction rarely spoken about, was at its peak in the 1960's, (When I attended school) and wielded almost as much power as the Pope (Godfather) himself. The Catholic nun was the absolute authority in the school. (You cross one of them, you cross all of them) A Catholic nun was always the principal (Don) of the school. The rest of them (Made Women) were teachers, tutors, hall monitors, munitions experts, and playground enforcers. More importantly, they controlled our Permanent Record.

The Nun mafia was far-reaching. Their power didn't end at the school door exits but extended into the Catholic school child's home life. A simple edit of our permanent record could cause catastrophic pain to your very soul, your money, and your ass. Perhaps not in that order, but almost always those three. (What is your Permanent Record? Every time a Catholic sinned, it would be recorded in your permanent record like a running tally of all the sins you committed in life. Then, when you died and went to the pearly gates to face Saint Peter, he would have all the ammunition he needed to send you to hell.)

If a child misbehaved, (Whispered in class, took to long in the bathroom, shirt not tucked all the way in, or smiled in a no smile zone) the nun acted immediately. You would be subjected to swift punishment in front of the entire class. Or what we liked to call, The Whack and Yack. The whack and yack consisted of being whacked by the nuns yard stick either across your hands or your ass several times, more intense if the sin was deemed severe. Then the child would receive a public humiliating tirade lecture on why Jesus is not happy with you  and  he is crying for the hideous sin you just committed. That was standard operating procedure for the nuns.

Now that your ass hurt and your soul ached, the third phase, the money phase, would be implemented. It was time to make the child feel remorse for the sin and want to atone for the damages to his soul. Or what we liked to call, (Extortion!) After said beating, the child would not be going outside for recess with the other children, but instead would have to stay behind for a private conference.

These conferences went something like this.
Nun: Patrick, you now know what you did earlier was a sin and that you had to be punished.
Patrick: Yes sister, I know.
Nun: Are you sorry for what you did?
Patrick: Yes sister, I am. (Sort of like, Thank you sir may I have another)
Nun: And how disruptive it was to the class and to the entire school?
Patrick: Yes sister, I know.
Nun: Will you ever commit that sin again?
Patrick: I hope not to sister. (Hold please, this is where they get you. Of course you are going to commit that exact same sin again, if you can call it a sin anyway, but they made you answer)
Nun: Perhaps after you go to confession this Saturday, you can add some extra money to your mass donation.
Patrick: Yes sister, I will. (A bold face lie!)
Nun: And in your student church envelope, maybe you can sacrifice a little more and add some extra money as well. Jesus needs it more than you do. It wasn't enough that our parents gave a weekly church envelope, (Pay off) but the student had one as well. With our names emblazoned on the front.
Patrick: Yes sister, I will try. (Not in a million years you old fuck!)
Nun: OK, recess is almost over. You have just enough time to erase and wash the chalkboard before the next class.
Patrick: Yes sister. (Quietly imagining duct tape over her mouth, her hands tied, and me kicking her into a well so deep that not even Lassie could save her)

Soul, money, and ass. One, two, three. Absolution. That is how the Catholic Nun Mafia rolled in the 1960's.

I wondered where that extra money the other students gave in their envelopes when they were subjected to the whack and yack. (I say other students because I never put an extra red cent in my envelope.) Every beginning school year, we would have to pledge (Payoff) an amount of money to give in our church envelopes. Did the sisters remove (Skim) the excess to further fund their organization? One can never be certain. However, they never seemed to lack or want for any tools or equipment needed.

The Catholic Nun Mafia affected more than just the students. It also affected the Parrish priests. And more importantly, the confessional. Everyone knew the Catholic priests were just as afraid of the nuns as the students were. (The Nuns knew everything that was going on in the school and church. Nothing ever got by them.) To avoid confrontation, and keep their secrets, we had it on good authority that they would inform the nuns of the juiciest sins the students committed so they (The Nuns) would have more leverage and play more psychological mind games. That's why I always disguised my voice in the confessional, so the priest wouldn't recognize me.

The other day I received a small package at my house. In the package was a chalk board eraser. Smeared in blood. With a note attached saying, "You can easily be erased!"

Amen!

Back To Catholic Nun Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Bob Evans - Bacon Cheeseburger Takeout

Bacon Cheeseburger Take Out Bob Evans

Bob Evans restaurant located in Youngstown, Ohio, is our next stop on the Blue Plate Special tour. However, this time, we ordered to go to test their take out service. I placed the call, ordered a bacon cheeseburger with french fries and the waitress said my order would be ready in about 20 minutes.

I arrived at Bob Evans in twenty minutes and went to the take out counter. A waitress asked if she could help me. I told her, "Pick up for the Grassy Knoll Institute!" She smiled and went into the back. She walked out with my order and packed it up in a plastic bag. She told me to pay at the check out.

As you can see, they did not skimp on the bacon. Two thick strips were on top and when I broke both pieces in half, they covered the burger completely. The cheese was plentiful, fully melted and hot. The bun was fresh, hot, and toasted just right. The one third pound burger patty was well cooked, juicy, and hot. The fries were golden brown, crunchy, not soggy, and hot. The container, a standard styrofoam container held up for well.

The burger was very good tasting. You could really taste the crisp thick bacon unlike other burgers where the bacon is undercooked and as thin as paper. The fries were very tasty as well.

Don't worry, I didn't forget about the cost which at $8 dollars was a fair price. All in all, the take out experience was worked well.

The Grassy Knoll Diner scores 3.75 out of 5 shots and recommends Bob Evans Cheeseburger take out for dinner.

Back To Blue Plate Special Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Like Pulling Teeth

I hate going to the dentist, but some times it is quite necessary. Like the time awhile back that my wisdom teeth were breaking through and i needed them removed. I made the appointment and went in for an exam to determine how the dentist was going to proceed. Dr. Frank, my dentist, after looking at my X-Ray reassured me that the procedure would be fairly simple. He prescribed some antibiotics to relieve the swelling and told me to come back on Saturday morning. So far so good.

Well, Saturday came and off I went. Actually my wife Patty drove me because Dr. Frank said I wouldn't be able to drive home that day. I walked in and the dental assistant came out and took me back to the office room almost immediately. Very good service.

Dr. Frank came in and told me that he was going to give me novacaine to deaden the pain and also laughing gas. He said he didn't want to put me under so I could communicate with him during the procedure if I felt to much pressure. He said that would lesson the swelling and pain during the recovery period. He injected the novacaine and said he would be back in a few minutes to allow the medicine to kick in. So far so good.

Dr. Frank returned, and began. The big bright light was turned on and he bent over and told me to open my mouth. He tested a few teeth asking me if it hurt. When I said it didn't, he proceeded. I felt some scraping and a little pressure and in about a minute, he showed me the first wisdom tooth extracted from my mouth. I thought this was going to be easy. A minute or so later, the second tooth was out. Halfway done in about five minutes. And then....

Dr. Frank then told me the first too teeth were the easy ones. The next two, however, were impacted. One on the top was coming in sideways and the one on the bottom was leaning forward. He said these two would be more difficult as he would have to do some cutting.

The next thing I heard was a loud "SNAP" inside my mouth. I could feel it shooting through my ears. I knew that was going to hurt later. Dr. Frank was breaking the tooth in pieces and extracting it piece by piece. He would cut a little and then "SNAP" and another piece would come out. He asked how I was doing and I gave him the thumbs up sign.

A half hour later and about twenty "SNAPS" Dr. Frank was stitching up my mouth and inserting gauze to stop the bleeding. He announced that I was done and for me to just lay back and rest and he would be back in a few minutes.

This wasn't so bad. I could feel pressure but no pain. Dr. Frank returned with his assistant and they helped me get up and I walked to a chair. I was a little woozy, but not bad. I heard him giving Patty and me instructions, plenty of rest, a painkiller prescription, no solid food, maybe some Jello or chicken soup, do not use a straw, no rinsing when brushing my teeth, just sort of let the water fall out. Standard procedure for recovery.

I made it the car and we went home. I made it upstairs and was very tired. Patty went to the drug store for my prescription while I laid down in bed. When she returned, she asked how I was feeling. I responded that I was feeling pretty good all things considered. She asked if I was hungry for the prescription said I should have something in my stomach before taking it. I said sure.

Patty made me some chicken soup. Not to hot, not to cold. Just perfect. I made my way to the kitchen table, sat down, took my spoon in my hand, smiled at Patty, and then passed out. My face fell right into the bowl of soup. Patty came rushing over and picked up my face asking if I was OK. I nodded yes, and Patty let go of my head. A second later, my face was back in the soup bowl. I was out cold.

Patty again picked my head out of th soup but this time I just hunched over and fell to the floor. Patty freaked out asking me if I was OK. I was totally incoherent. She said I was talking jibberish and couldn't get off the floor. She dragged me into the living room onto the carpet and got me a pillow for my head. She then called the doctor. Dr. Frank said this was normal, a reaction to the laughing gas and if she could get me in bed to rest.

Patty then got me a blanket, covered me, and sat with me for an hour watching me to make sure I was OK. In an hour, I was coherent enough to help her get me in bed. I slept the rest of the day and woke up Sunday afternoon. I was starving. This time, the chicken soup was pretty good.

Back To Inner Sanctum Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

DirecTV Versus Dish Network

In this Sunday's local newspaper, there were two advertisements touting DirecTV satellite service and Dish Network satellite service. Both ads are flashy, colorful, and informative. However, upon inspection of both ads, they both claim to have the most HD channels.

DirecTv Deals

In DirecTV's ad, they claim in bold print that nobody has more HD channels. They state they have 130 plus HD channels and Dish Network and cable has less. Well, that sounds like a pretty good selling feature. The most HD channels. Over 130 channels. What in the world could Dish Network offer that is better than 130 plus HD channels. Check out the next photo to see what they offer.

Dish TV Deals

In Dish Networks ad, they claim to have over 140 HD channels available. The ad follows up with, "No one offers more HD than Dish Network!" Hmmn... Houston, we have a problem. How can both satellite companies claim to have the most HD channels?

Simple! The devil is in the details. DirecTV claims in the fine print that Dish TV only has 115 FULL TIME HD channels. Apparently that means several channels are not broadcast 24 hours a day. Still, DishTV has 140 plus channels.



Lesson to be learned here. Both DirecTV and DishTV claims are dubious at best. Use caution when signing a contract. Expect a two year contract. Ask what the cost of the selected package will be after the sign up bonus. Make sure you ask about the cost of the DVR and multiple room charges as well. Ask about the premium channels like HBO and Cinemax. Ask what the cancellation fees are if you do not like the service. It could be in the hundreds of dollars. Ask how long and how much a service call will be and cost.

When it comes to buying TV satellite service from DirecTV or Dish Network, the Grassy Knoll Institute warns: Caveat Emptor. (let the buyer beware)

Back To Conspiracy Theories Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Happy New Year 2010

Happy New Year From Thunder Cat Newman

From everyone here at the Grassy Knoll Institute, including our very own Thunder Cat Newman:
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Back To Christmas Holiday Archives

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

1. 
   

   Gumby said

   January 1, 2010 at 11:24 pm e
   Happy new year. You have one cool cat on your hands.
   Reply
   • 
     

     LOTGK said

     January 2, 2010 at 2:04 am e
     And to you as well my friend. Lets hope it’s a good one, with out any fear….
     Reply
2. 
   

   Leeuna said

   January 1, 2010 at 11:43 pm e
   Happy New Year!!! What a totally beautiful cat. Is he yours?
   Reply
   • 
     

     LOTGK said

     January 2, 2010 at 2:05 am e
     And Happy new Year to you.
     And yes, this is Thunder, my cat. She is 4.5 pounds and loves the shower, the sink, the blow dryer, and the sweeper. Crazy Cat for sure.
     Reply
3. 
   

   Fracas said

   January 2, 2010 at 5:24 pm e
   Happy New Year to you… and Thunder (well ok, and anyone else living in your home with you that I, as a reader of your blog but yet… a stranger, am not aware of but who would be important to you nonetheless because after all, those people must be more important to you than us and we accept that…)
   
   Reply
   • 
     

     LOTGK said

     January 3, 2010 at 12:11 am e
     And Happy New Year from Thunder, Storm, Pat, Patrick, and Patty.
     Reply
4. 
   

   Izzy said

   January 3, 2010 at 2:21 am e
   Wild cat dude. Did it let you shoot those fireworks at her.
   Reply
   • 
     

     LOTGK said

     January 5, 2010 at 8:24 am e
     They weren’t fireworks, they were party poppers. and no, we didn’t shoot them at Thunder, we placed the streamers on her head after the fact.
     Reply
5. 
   

   DataKing said

   January 4, 2010 at 12:17 pm e
   Cool Cat. Happy new year grassy knoll institute.
   Reply
   • 
     

     LOTGK said

     January 5, 2010 at 8:36 am e
     Happy new Year King.
     Reply