Showing posts with label merry christmas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label merry christmas. Show all posts

12/25/2011

Santa Claus Must Be A Mormon

sexy-santa-claus-babes
Merry Christmas From The Grassy Knoll
I guess we finally know why Santa is so jolly and only works one night a year. Ho Ho Ho and Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Grassy Knoll Institute.



LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


 Responses to “Santa Claus Must Be A Mormon”


  1. Anonymous said

    Lotgk: The Santa Claus being mormon thats not funny because I am Mormon

  2. Gumby said

    Looks like he gets busy every night of the year.

  3. Anti-Christ said

    Santa is not a mormon. Simply move the letters of his name around a tad.
    SANTA
    SATAN

12/24/2011

Merry Christmas From The Bad Guy

say-goodnight-to-the-bad-guy
Merry Christmas From The Bad Guy
All I have in this world are my balls and this snowman. And I don’t break them for no one.
Merry Christmas From The Bad Guy…
LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

 Responses to “Merry Christmas From The Bad Guy”


  1. 00dozo said

    Well, I would hope that your balls and snowman are made with the real thing(s) … (and I ain’t talking coke).
    Happy Holidays, LOTGK!!
    ;-)

  2. Moominboy said

    And Merry Christmas to you too! :D

  3. Gumby said

    Say hello to my little snowman.
    Happy Christmas grassy dude.

12/21/2010

Minnesota Vikings Most Popular Christmas Ornament

minnesota-vikings-most-popular-christmas-ornament
Minnesota Vikings Most Popular Christmas Ornament
For the 2010 Christmas season, this is the most popular decoration purchased in the state of Minnesota. “Fired” Childress pot warmers are running a close second.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all the Vikings fans, a very good quarterback in the draft.
LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


Responses to “Most Popular Decoration In Minnesota”


  1. Gumby said

    Where can I get my hands on a pair of those pot warmers?

  2. Valdunagan said

    That is the Viking season in a nutshell, or gingerbread house. The roof came crashing in on them. I think Jenn Sterger had Favre’s mind somewhere else and that is why he had such a terrible season.

    • LOTGK said

      Very valid points. Favre was off his game the entire season. Perhaps realizing that his marriage, career, and golden boy status could go up in flames had his mind somewhere other than the blitzing linebacker.

  3. Anti-Christ said

    I told you last year that Brett Favre and I had a one year deal. He wanted the deal extended, but a contract is a contract.

1/01/2010

Happy New Year 2010

happy-new-year-pussy-cat
Happy New Year From Thunder Cat Newman
From everyone here at the Grassy Knoll Institute, including our very own Thunder Cat Newman:
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and HAPPY NEW YEAR!



LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL



Responses to “Happy New Year 2010”


  1. Gumby said

    Happy new year. You have one cool cat on your hands.

  2. Leeuna said

    Happy New Year!!! What a totally beautiful cat. Is he yours?

    • LOTGK said

      And Happy new Year to you.
      And yes, this is Thunder, my cat. She is 4.5 pounds and loves the shower, the sink, the blow dryer, and the sweeper. Crazy Cat for sure.

  3. Fracas said

    Happy New Year to you… and Thunder (well ok, and anyone else living in your home with you that I, as a reader of your blog but yet… a stranger, am not aware of but who would be important to you nonetheless because after all, those people must be more important to you than us and we accept that…)
    ;-)

  4. Izzy said

    Wild cat dude. Did it let you shoot those fireworks at her.

    • LOTGK said

      They weren’t fireworks, they were party poppers. and no, we didn’t shoot them at Thunder, we placed the streamers on her head after the fact.

  5. DataKing said

    Cool Cat. Happy new year grassy knoll institute.


12/24/2009

A Christmas Ticket To Ride

On Christmas morning, a policeman on horseback was sitting at a traffic light, and next to him was a kid on his shiny new bike. The policeman said to the kid, “That’s a nice bike you got there son. Did Santa Clause get that for you?” The kid smiled and replied, “Yeah! Isn’t it great.” The policeman said, “Well next year, tell Santa to put a tail light on that bike.” The policeman then proceeded to write the kid a $20.00 ticket for a bicycle safety violation.
The kid took the ticket but before he rode off he said, “By the way, that’s a nice looking horse you got there. Did Santa clause get that for you?” Humoring the kid, the policeman smiled and said, “Why yes, he sure did.” The kid said, “Well next year tell Santa Clause to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top.”
Merry FN Christmas!
LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Responses to “A Ticket To Ride Christmas”


  1. Max Jackl said

    LMAO!

Minnesota Vikings Christmas

minnesota-vikings-report
Viking Thunder Report
minnesota-vikings-die-hard-fans
11 Viking Victories
On the eleventh day of Christmas,
The Grassy Knoll sent to me,
Eleven Viking Victories.
The Minnesota Vikings are sitting at 11 wins and winner of the NFC North division. The next two games are critical to nail down the playoff bye week. Here’s to Adrian Peterson racking up 150 yards, Sidney Rice hauling in 100 receiving yards, Percy Harvin returning a kickoff for a score, and brett Favre to checking off into a running play.
Merry Christmas Viking Fans!!!
SKOL VIKINGS!

minnesota vikings icon

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/23/2009

On The Tenth Day Of Christmas

christmas-pussy-trim
Thunder Cat Newman Trimming The Tree

On the tenth day of Christmas,
The Grassy Knoll sent to me,
Thunder tangled in trimmings.


You all know my cat Thunder, the 4.5 pound cat that loves water, the sweeper, and my computer desk. She also loves helping me trim the Christmas tree. Here she is helping me untangle the silver tinsel.

Merry Christmas!


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/20/2009

On The Seventh Day Of Christmas

14 Deadly Sins
On the seventh day of Christmas,
The Grassy Knoll sent to me,
Seven new deadly sins...


Vatican City, Rome:
Pope Benedict XVI announced today the Catholic Church, after 1500 years, has revised its list of the 7 deadly sins and added 7 new "Modern" sins. The Pope felt that with the globalization of religion, a new focus on the evils of society had to be addressed. The original seven deadly sins of Pride, Envy, Gluttony, Lust, Anger, Greed, and Sloth just couldn't cover the complex society humanity has evolved into.

Pope Benedict XVI released his updated list of 7 new activities considered to be deadly, or mortal sins and wants all Catholics to incorporate the list into their lives and teach their children so that future generations will become more spiritual and Godlike.

The Modern Seven deadly Sins are as follows:

1. Yanni: Any musician that irritates an audience to the level of hostile intentions.

2. Speidi: To overexpose oneself to the level of vomitus claiming self-importance. (See Spencer Pratt & Heidi Montag)

3. Lip Sync Ashley: Thou shall not charge huge amounts of money for a concert or event and Lip Sync to the audience.

4. Too Dutch: To hate for absolutely no reason whatsoever.

5. A Gosselin: Allowing parents to exploit their children for profit or fame by forcing them on reality shows. (See Jon And Kate Plus 8 and Balloon Boy Dad)

6. Kanyeism: To interrupt award ceremonies, weddings, other events with intent to blather on how the winner is not deserving of said accomplishment.

7. Bushing: To run the world economy into a recessionary state all for the good of one man or company.

Merry Christmas!


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/14/2009

On The First Day Of Christmas

leg-lamp-a-major-award
I Present The Leg Lamp - A Major Award
To kick off the Christmas Holiday season, I thought I would sing the Twelve Days Of Christmas for everyone. However, Patty informed me of the International ban from 35 countries preventing me from singing.

But its Christmas, so damn the torpedoes. Here goes...

On the first day of Christmas,
The Grassy Knoll sent to me,
A leg lamp in the window.


Oh yea, can you spot the LOTGK logo.
Hint, its not on the Italian lamp.


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

12/02/2009

Lost Update - Island Of Misfit Toys


Lost Update – Prelude To Season Six – 12/25/2009
It’s Christmas day and instead of dreaming of sugar plums dancing in my head, I’m thinking about season six of ABC Lost. In particularly, how similar Lost is to the 1964 animated Christmas special, Rudolph The Red nosed Reindeer, but more exact, to the Island Of Misfit Toys.
Let me explain…..
island of misfit toys from rudolph the red nosed reindeer
Misfit Island
Lost takes place on a mysterious island inhabited by outlandish people where everyone on the island seems to be an outsider, one that doesn’t fit in well within society. Misfit Island is a mysterious secluded island home to misfit toys, toys that just don’t seem to fit in to society.
_______________________________________________
bumbles bouncs, the abominable snowman
Bumbles Bounce
The Lost island is inhabited by a ferocious monster that pops up and terrorizes the inhabitants. They call it the Smoke Monster. There are secrets that certain people know about the monster and are somehow able to control it. Misfit island also has a ferocious monster. They call it The Bumble. And Yukon Cornelius knows that Bumbles bounce and knows how to control it. They ain’t nothing without their choppers.
_________________________________________________

Guns On Lost
On Lost, there are plenty of guns on the island. Sawyer has a suitcase of guns. Kate has guns. Jack has guns. The others have guns. The other others have guns. On Misfit island, one of the toys is a gun. A significance that a gun played a prominent character on Misfit island.
________________________________________________

Boat That Don't Float
On the Lost island, there was a freighter that brought the evil others to the island. The boat sank. Also, John Locke sunk the submarine stationed on the island. Desmond’s boat ran aground on the island. All the boats seem to sink on the Lost island. Misfit island also has a boat, and guess what, it doesn’t float either. Coincidence? I think not!
_________________________________________________

Misfit Campfire
On Lost, the central point was the camp the castaways gathered around. From the pilot episode when the castaways were around the camp fire and the smoke monster made it’s first appearance, to the others cabins community. Misfit island also had a camp fire site that was the focal point.
_______________________________________________

King Moonraiser
Moving on, the Lost island has a mysterious powerful entity that runs the lives of the castaways and the others. People call him Jacob, who lives in the old Egyptian style ruins. on Misfit island, the broken toys are governed by King Moonraiser, a mysterious flying lion that lives in a castle that looks very similar to an Egyptian palace.
______________________________________________

Misfit Castle
This is King Moonraiser and the throne he sits on governing over all the misfit toys. He goes out searching the world every night and brings back toys that have been abandoned and not loved anymore. On Lost, Jacob has also visited people and apparently brought them back to the island. All the people on the island seem to be broken and unloved.
_____________________________________________________

Dr. Jack Sheppard
Meet Herbie, misfit, dentist. He moonlights making toys in Christmas town. The head elf is always on his case telling him how inadequate he is and that he is not up to standard with all the other elves. On Lost, Herbie is Jack Sheppard. The surgeon is in his fathers domineering shadow. Somehow Jack doesn’t fit in and wants to start fresh.
______________________________________________

Christian Sheppard
Although he doesn’t look anything like Christian Sheppard, the head elf of Christmas town is a lot like him. One can only speculate if the head elf liked to tip a few back during work hours, but we do know he had a change of heart towards Herbie and even opened up to him, just like Christian did with Jack.
____________________________________________________

Sawyer - James
On Lost Sawyer is the bad boy and the comic relief of the show. Everyone calls him Sawyer but his real name is James. On Misfit island, Charlie, the “Charlie In The Box” was mistaken for a jack In the Box. Just his mere physical appearance makes him the comic relief.
_________________________________________________

Kate Austin
On Lost, Kate is a woman being brought back to justice in handcuffs. She alienated herself from everyone in her life. No one loved her anymore. Misfit island has Dollie, who looks a lot like Kate, and all she wants to be is loved again.
_______________________________________________

Hurley
On lost, Hurley, an over weight luckiest unluckiest person on the planet just wanted to get away and have a simple existence. I’m just saying that the pink elephant reminds me of Hurley. A lot!
____________________________________

Yukon
Misfit island has Yukon Cornelius, prospector, miner, authority figure, and controller of the Bumble. No one knows how he go there but he seems to know the lay of the land. On Lost, John Locke knows how to control the smoke monster, knows the way of the Lost island, and is an authority figure on the island.
_______________________________________________

Lost Season Six
So there it is. ABC Lost is about a group of misfits stranded on a deserted island where supernatural things occur. Each character just wants to be loved again and have a normal life. Misfit island is a place inhabited by broken unloved toys governed by a supernatural flying lion. all the toys want is to get off the island and be loved again.
______________________________________________
Merry Christmas Lost Fans.


LURKING, NOT REALLY LOST, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


Responses to “Lost Update – Island Of Misfit Toys”


  1. Lost Forever said

    Your lost site never ceases to amaze me. You took a 1960s cartoon and turned it into a lost parody. And what amazes me is that its believeable. LOL. One year of Lost left, 16 episodes. Cant wait for the end.

    • LOTGK said

      A smidgen of truth always makes the tale more believable.
      Also, I just watched the Star Trek 11 DVD last night, and in the added bonus features, J.J. Abrams offered up that Rod serling’s Twilight Zone was his favorite television show growing up.
      So perhaps I am correct when i say that Lost is based on the Zone. We shall see.

      • N.Y. Nick said

        LOTGK- i thought i told you before, i might be remembering a post i made somewhere else, but you are correct about your “Twilight Zone” theory! I still give you the credit you deserve for being able to see the parrallels on your own, and articulate them on many levels. Not only did you make comparisons of “Lost” to the overall concept of “Twilight Zone” as a whole series, you broke down different episodes and how the detals of that particular episode connected to “Lost” , wether the connection was which characters represent which characters on lost, or a certian phenomenom in a episode will compare whats happening on “Lost”. You also compare particular “Twilight Zone” episodes to the overall concept of “Lost” as a whole series.
        With that said, from the very begining it was a show meant to be “Twilight Zone” meets “Survivor”! JJ Abrahms, Damon Lindeloff, Carlton Cuse, and many more writers/producers never kept that a secret from square one. The people who bring us “Lost” are extremely well read and intelligent intelectuals who got ideas for “Lost” from many differnt books, movies, mythology etc… Anytime you see a book or a reference to pop culture there is a reason. Even though they got ideas from many sources, the main concept of “Lost” is from “Twilight Zone”
        I want to read all the books that are seen or talked about in “Lost”. They show them for a reason!

        • LOTGK said

          My very first Lost update mentions a Twilight Zone feel for the show, way before any websites and blogs popped up with every theory under the sun.
          I still stand by my theory. We’ll know in May.

  2. Fracas said

    Hope you had a Happy Christmas!

    • LOTGK said

      Yes we did, thank you.
      I hope you did as well and hope for the new year to bring you joy, happiness, health, and twice as many comments as 2009. :D

  3. Max Jackl said

    Whats going to happen if you turn out to be correct.
    When worlds collide.

  4. Flip Across said

    This is genius. Hilarious. Insightful. Thanks. Happy holidays to you as well misfit island toys.

  5. Dee said

    CANT WAIT 4 LOST AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. Becky M said

    I just love this show. Rudolph, not Lost. The bumble is so cute without his teeth. I have the stuff doll of him.

  7. Anti-Christ said

    You got it all wrong. Misfit Island is not associated at all with Lost. Its a picture of Purgatory, where all people stop on their journey to either heaven or Hell. Rudolph is a bitch.

  8. Jones Bones said

    Man, you are way out in left field. Funny though but weird funny.