11/02/2016

Vikings Have A New Offensive Coordinator - Now What

Today, it was announced that offensive coordinator Norv Turner resigned from the Minnesota Vikings. After two and a half seasons with the team, the offense is ranked 31st out of 32 teams. Pat Shurmur has been promoted to replace him. Shurmur and the Vikings face the Detroit Lions this coming Sunday in a NFC North clash.

Turners exit is one of many the Vikings have had to endure this season. Beginning with Teddy Bridgewater, starting quarterback, suffered a severe knee injury during practice just days before the regular season was to begin. If that wasn't bad enough, Adrian Peterson, NFL rushing leader in 2015 and arguably the best running back on the field, went down in week two with a knee injury. Add left tackle Kalil and a horde of other starters both on offense and defense left the team thin at depth.

In related news, Maytag also reported several repairmen have resigned and are now employed by the Vikings.

So now what?

Shurmur knows offense and he knows Sam Bradford, the quarterback the Vikings traded for with the Eagles eight days before the season started for a hefty price of next years first round draft pick. These are the predictions I forsee for the upcoming Lions game and future games going forward.

Leading rusher for the Vikings this Sunday: Cordarrlle Patterson. Patterson is the kick return man and part receiver but come Sunday he will lead the team in rushing. shurnurs scheme will have Patterson in motion looping behind Bradford when in the shotgun formation. This will keep at least one defensive player from targeting only Bradford. Patterson will also line up in the split back formation as well. Patterson will get the ball half a dozen times and have success in moving the chains.

Shurmur will also deploy a fast passed no huddle offense with quick hit passes to avoid Bradford from getting sacked. Rookie Treadwell will debut and be utilized in short passes across the middle. These changes will be enough to keep the Lions at bay and off balance just enough to score enough points to win.

Vikings win 23-16 Sunday.

On a sidenote: If you need a good washer or dryer, you know who to call.

SKOL VIKINGS!
minnesota vikings icon

LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/31/2016

Last Halloween Post 2016

Happy Halloween From The Grassy Knoll Institute
Happy Halloween to all the faithful readers of the Grassy Knoll Institute. (And the unfaithful ones as well) Hopefully you enjoyed the bevy of beauties in our sexy Halloween costumes, bumper crop of Halloween melons, humorous Halloween tales, haunted attractions critiques, and all other things Halloween. I truly appreciate your patronage and comments through all these years. 

The blogging landscape has shifted dramatically over the past five years as more viable options such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc, has risen to popularity leaving many people abandoning their own blog and blogging social circle.

The Grassy Knoll Institute team has decided to stick around awhile longer. Perhaps, just perhaps, like the picture above, we will be the sole surviving blog from the old Geocities, Xanga, Xoom, Live Journal, Usenet, Vox, Home Builders, Yahoo Groups, Modblog, Home hosted site on Go Daddy, Wordpress, assorted platforms I have forgotten about, and of course Blogspot. (All of which the Grassy Knoll Institute published an iteration of on said platforms)

We started the Grassy Knoll Institute in 1995 (21 years for those keeping score) as an entertaining way for my son (Lead Scientist) and myself to learn the art of HTML coding. It took hours to create the first page with many a trial and error until we finally pushed the published button and the President Kennedy Assassination Conspiracy Theory appeared on our Gateway 2000 computer.

To us, it has been a wild ride as millions of viewers have visited our little slice of oddity on the Internet. We hope we have entertained you throughout the years and hope to continue into the future. And.... My ABC Lost theory was correct by the way.....

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


Jessica Nigri - Best Halloween Melons 2016

Jessica Nigri - Best Halloween Melons
Winner of the 2016 Dark Zone Halloween Melons is none other than Jessica Nigri.

In just one of her many Halloween costumes, Jessica portrays a sexy female Freddie Kreuger. Visit her Instagram page to see more unbelievable costumes. Jessica Nigri Instagram.


Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Best Group Halloween Costume 2016

Taste-The-Rainbow-Best-Group-Halloween-Costume-2016
Taste The Rainbow - Best Group Halloween Costume 2016. 
Winner Of The 2016 Best Group Halloween Costume:

The Skittles Candy Girls - Taste The Rainbow!
This is not only the best group Halloween costume of 2016, butt the best in the history of the Halloween Dark Zone.

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/30/2016

Youngstown Ohio Zombie Crawl 2016


Saturday night, October 29th was the annual Youngstown, Ohio Zombie Crawl. Zombies arrived at the B andO Station and at 6pm sharp performed the Thriller Dance.

After the dance, the zombie horde gathered and crawled up the Peanut bridge. It was a perfect night. The sky clear with no rain and temperatures in the low 70's.

Enjoy the zombie crawl.

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

And Now A Word From Our Sponsors

Zom "B" Gone Cleaner
During the Zombie Apocalypse spills and stains (Especially blood and guts) are going to occur. 
You now have a defense the next time zombies break down your door and leave a trail of entrails all over your newly vacuumed living room carpet. 

Step One: Kill the zombie(s) inside your house. 
Step two: Remove said zombie(s) from your house keeping care not to allow more zombies to enter. 
Step three: Spray a generous amount of Zom B Gone on the stain(s) on the carpet and allow the cleansing enzymes to activate.
Step Four: While waiting for the enzymes to activate, reload your gun(s) or sharpen your blade(s) in anticipation of the next zombie attack. 
Step Five: Vacuum affected (Infected) area. Let dry before you walk on the carpet.
Step Six: Repeat Steps one through five. 

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/29/2016

Ripleys Haunted Adventure 2016 - Gatlinburg


Ripley's Haunted Adventure is located on the Parkway in Gatlinburg, Tennessee.It is a very popular haunt during the month of October. I visited this haunt several times before but never in the month of October. Until this year.

Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in the month of October, at 6PM sharp, Ripley's has their own version of a zombie crawl. A horde of monsters appear and parade down the Parkway ending up in front of the Haunted Adventure. The monsters interact with the people on the street. After about 20 minutes, the monsters filter into the haunt and add to the excitement and fright.

We bought our tickets earlier in the day to avoid the long line to buy in the evening. When puchasing the tickets, you will be given many ticket options. The packages all include the Aquarium plus the other Ripley attractions in the city. If you are planning on staying for several days and want to sample the Ripleys attraction, buying the package is a good idea. We opted for the $1 off per person coupon we found in one of the many coupons books throughout the Parkway.

There were about 100 people in line when we got to Ripleys right before 6pm. We filmed the monster parade as the Ripley monsters walked up the street and interwacted with the crowd of people that had gathered.

After a short wait, less than twenty minutes, it was now our time to step into the rickety old cage that takes it's paying customers (Victims) to the top of the haunt. It is a very effective prop. Very loud, old, looks unsafe, and has a hint of danger to it. We met a crazy man at the top. I was informed that my camera must be turned off at this point. I obliged.

The haunt is a self guided tour. We were in a group of six people. I was the lead, my wife Patty behind me, the others behind her. We were instructed to put our hand on the persons back in front of us. A few seconds later we began our march through the haunt.

I will say the haunt is much larger than what it looks like from the outside. There were many rooms inside to navigate through. The props and graphics were above average and the actors were well trained and effective. This haunt was all about misdirection.

After about 30 minutes, we found our way out. We stepped into the elevator and.... I won't spoil it for you.

One thing I didn't like about this haunt. Outside while we were waiting in line, a woman was selling fiber optic lights to help you see in the haunt. She said it was absolutely necessary to see inside the haunt for it was pitch black inside. The lights, (Which were throw away quality) cost five dollars. I noticed that if you bought the lights at the ticket box office, they were only $2 dollars. Whip a rip off. I declined to buy the light. The woman selling them told me I would be sorry.

I was not. At no time did I ever need the fiber optic light. DO NOT BUY THE LIGHT! IT IS A RIP OFF. The rest of the haunted adventure was very entertaining and enjoyable. It was actually fun. We recommend it in the month of October.

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/28/2016

Breast Zombie Makeup

The Halloween Dark Zone Breast Best Zombie Makeup Award goes to Seatbelt Susie. The makeup is spot on. From the red colored eyes, to the dark dead eye shadow, to the amazing artistry and makeup on her mouth to off course her breasts. The whole team wins.

Halloween Tip: Always wear your seatbelt, even if you are on a short journey. It may just save your life. Even during the Zombie Apocalypse.

Folks, Seatbelt Susie was not wearing her seatbelt. Perhaps that is how she became a zombie.

Happy Halloween


LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/27/2016

Zombie Eyes


Zombie Eyes
I've been meaning to tell you
I've got this feelin' that won't subside
I look at you and I fantasize
You're mine tonight
Now I've got you in my sights
With these zombie eyes
One look at you and I can't disguise
I've got zombie eyes
I feel the magic between you and I


Sung to the tune Hungry Eyes by Eric Carmen

Happy Halloween

LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/26/2016

Mysterious Mansion Of Gatlinburg



Mysterious Mansion of Gatlinburg, Tennessee located on River road. Upon the approach, the entire area was doused with an eerie purple light illuminating the house. Haunted music was being piped in just loud enough to add ambiance. This haunt looked very promising.

We walked up the porch steps and were greeted by a standard fare monster, (Hired help in a mask) and proceeded to walk in to the foyer. The haunt looked well built, not a cheesy slap em together type haunt. The props on the outside, the hearst wagon and the walls were painted and molded to look like a real mansion.

Our first shock was the price of admission. (Jusk kidding!) Fourteen dollars a person.
Tip: There are countless coupon books in Gatlinburg. There is a dollar off coupon for Mysterious mansion.

Upon paying, the cashier, dressed in classic Goth, asked if we knew the history of the house. We said we didn’t and he was delighted and continued his story. The history was in 1903 a family that lived there went berserk and they killed each other inside the house. Since then, the family has been haunting the house moving furniture, flickering the lights, and the standard possession type haunt. He laid it on thick as several people were listening very intently. he then told our group to proceed through the door on his right and wait for the caregiver.

As we prepared to enter the “Starting” room, the library, one young man, age around 10, didn’t want any part of the haunted house. His parents kept goading him to go in. He was actually frozen in the hallway, he couldn’t move forward or backward. He just stared into the darkness for several minutes. Finally, the parents promised him that nothing would happen to him, and then his father took and hand and through the door to the library we went.

Minutes later, it was our turn and we walked into the library room. Of course it was darkly lit, or lit darkly, whatever, and the curator appeared dressed in some sort of zombie type make up. He was very good at what he does. He explained the rules of the house in a very spooky manner. He made sure everyone in the group understood and then announced our journey was to begin and pointed to the fireplace and told us all to push. We pushed and soon found ourselves in the maze.

We slowly navigated our way through the halls feeling for the doors to get through.

Through the course of the house, we climbed several flights of steps and at one point, were able to walk out onto the balcony and look down onto the public. (Check out the pictures I snapped at the bottom showing the balcony.) Of course, I pulled my shirt over my head and flailed my arms wildly screaming that I couldn’t find my head. I heard a lot of people down below laughing at my silly antics.

I will not disclose the shocks in store when you visit but rest assured, they are very good indeed. However, one thing you must experience is the view from the inside balcony looking down on the first floor. Step out onto the balcony and view the entire haunt from high above. It is a great scene.

The positives: Plenty of entertainment value. We all had fun. It had the feel of a haunted mansion.

The outside exterior screams haunted house. The purple glow was awesome looking, especially from the street. The Gothic steel gates and tiki torches along with the other props completed the experience.

Tip; Make sure you visit the house in October. The haunt is well stacked with additional monsters (Hired help) for the Halloween season. There are not that many monsters (Actors) the other 11 months.

Tip: This haunt can be extreme at some parts. Listen to your small children. If they do not want to go, heed their wishes. The group we were with had two children, both about 10 years old. They were frightened literally out of their wits.

Happy Halloween
LURKING, IN THE SHADOWS, ON THE GRASSY KNOLL