3/17/2010

An Irish Catholic Dog

Sean Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day his faithful dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked Father Patrick, "Father, me dog is dead. Could you please be sayin a mass for the poor creature?"

Father Patrick was taken back and replied, "I'm afraid not Muldoon. We cannot be having services for an animal in the church. Dogs don't have souls. But there are some Baptists down the lane, and there's no tellin what they believe in. Maybe they'll do something for your dog."

Muldoon was dejected and hung his head down low and said, Well then, I best be gettin right over there Father. Do you be thinking $5,000 dollars is enough to donate to them for the service?"

Upon hearing this Father Patrick exclaimed, "Sweet Mary and Joseph Muldoon, Why didn't you be tellin me your dog was Catholic?"

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY


Happy St. Patrick's Day!


LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

3/16/2010

Lost Update - Sympathy For The Devil


Lost Update - Season Six - 03/16/2010


Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and faith

And I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game


MIB tells Kate that he made a promise to protect everyone, and that included Kate. He tells Kate to take his hand and he will show her where Sawyer is. He attempts a smile and calming affect but Kate sees through it and does not take MIB's hand. At that exact moment, MIB reminded me of Satan, attempting to win over the people he duped into believing he was good. So you see, my Lost theory is spot on.

Just what is the Grassy Knoll Institutes Lost theory….I’ve been waiting six years to tell you…..
Although it appears the survivors of Oceanic flight 815 are on a tropical island, they are being deceived. There is no island. The survivors are in a virtual reality laboratory. All the castaways are interconnected to one another sharing each others thoughts, memories, and feelings. While in this virtual reality laboratory, a battery of physical and mental experiments are performed on them. And who is running these experiments? As Juliet stated, the Aliens of course.

Tonight's episode was all about Sawyer, or Ford, or Lafluer, take your pick. We get a glimpse into his mind, his psyche. Both on the island and during his sideways flash.

What do we know about Sawyer to this point? First, he gets plenty of women. But most importantly, he is driven by one single thought. Hatred towards one man, the man who gunned down his parents in cold blood. His mission in life, to exact revenge, to kill the man who murdered his parent and ruined his life.

Sawyer became a grifter, a con man, a cheap man, out for himself, not letting anyone get in his way. These attributes would serve him well on the Lost island. In his sideway flash, we find that Sawyer is still running his con game, but this time, as a cop. He tells Charlotte, who he meets and beds, that he had a choice of becoming a criminal or a cop. He chose to be a cop.

However, although his cons are on the right side of the law, he is still pursuing the man who murdered his parents. Splitting hairs perhaps, but it is a fine line between good and evil.

OK, VR theory time.
Sawyer is being manipulated. He has been thrust into several scenario's to observe what choice he makes and what is the ultimate outcome of said choice. In Sawyers case, it appears no matter what scenario he is in, he ends up alone, bitter, and filled with hatred. Think back on the previous five Lost seasons, Sawyers story, a loner, loses Kate, Juliet, his wife in the flash, Charlotte, etc. No matter what choice he makes, he ends up alone, bitter, and filled with hatred.

Perhaps this is what Jacob and MIB were referring to in the season five finale, when Jacob says, "It only ends once. Anything that happens before that, it’s just progress." He is searching for the right scenario for Sawyer, the right variables, the right experiment, to allow him to be happy. We'll have to wait to the series finale to see if he ever achieves that.

One more thing I noticed tonight. The castaways are again split into groups. MIB's group, supposedly the evil group, and Ilana's group, supposedly the good group. Ilana's group is back where the season one started, at the shoreline by the wreckage. MIB's group is further inland. Remember when the castaways split into two groups, one wanting to stay on the shore, one wanting to venture more inland. It's all happening once again but this time, under a slightly different scenario.

Folks, face it, Lost is about virtual reality, and the castaways are being experimented and manipulated without their knowing. Data is being collected to help researchers in future experiments to better understand all the variables of life, and death.

"It only ends once. Anything that happens before that, it’s just progress. "


Tidbits From Tonight's Episode:

* We see Sawyers standard pigeon drop con but this time, the girl is well ahead of him. Thought I saw a nip on her too.

* Sawyer is a detective in side flash. The complete opposite of what he is on the island.

* Miles is Sawyers partner.

* MIB reveals to Sawyer that he is the smoke thing that killed all those people.

* Charlotte was looking pretty damn hot.

* Sawyer is back to the Hydra station, where he was tortured in the bear cages. Sees Kates dress.

* Claire attacks Kate, tries to kill her. Sayid does nothing about it.

* MIB stops Claire, slaps her, and explains to her about Kate.

* Sawyer goes on a mission for MIB, a recon to spy on the people with the plane.

* Sawyer finds the plane, it doesn't look suitable for flying, debris scattered all around. A path leading into the jungle.

* Finds a pile of dead rotting people.

* Runs down Zoe, who looks like Danielle, se says she is the last one left.

* Surprise. Zoe is not the nerdy helpless woman, but a cunning conniving bitch who sets Sawyer up. He knew it though.

* MIB tells Kate his mother was crazy. Yes, he had a mother, a long time ago, before he became MIB. Very interesting.

* He refers to Kate that Aaron is in danger because Claire is a crazy mother also.

* They have a sub! Widmore's sub.

* QUOTE: "People aren't really gone when they die!"

* Sawyer and Widmore strike a deal. Sawyer lives up to his mantra.

* Anthony Cooper.

* Kate literally runs into Sawyer. He runs her down.

* Jacob can be seen as a bystander in the street witnessing Kate and Sawyer.

* No, not really! just checking to see if you are still reading this or moved to the comments section already.

* A shout out to Travis from Las Vegas. I told you it was Virtual Reality.

Until next week, Get Lost!


LURKING, STILL LOST ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

3/15/2010

Sexy Irish Cheerleaders

Sexy Irish Cheerleaders
Sexy Irish Cheerleaders
Pay close attention to this sexy Irish cheerleader. During one of the animation cycles she pulls out more than usual.
I dare you to look away!
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
Happy St. Patrick's Day!


LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

Irish Celtic Cross Meaning

Celtic Cross Meaning
Celtic Cross Meaning
The Celtic Cross (Irish Cross) is an Irish symbol combining a standard Christian cross with a sun ring circling and connecting the cross limbs. Legend has it that St. Patrick in his effort to convert the Celtic Pagans to Christianity, added the sun circle to the cross to instill in the Pagans that Christianity was similar to their Druid beliefs. The sun and moon were important symbols to the Pagans as they believed they were magical and givers of life.

Some Irish Catholic priests state the Celtic Cross is a symbol of everlasting life through the crucifixion of Christ.

The Celtic Cross legend has it's origin at the same time as the ancient Egyptian pyramids dating back some 5000 years. However, the oldest standing Celtic Crosses can be traced back to the early 8th century.

Many Irish Catholic priests teach the Celtic Cross is a symbol of everlasting life through the crucifixion of Christ making it a desired choice as a tombstone with many Irish Christians.


Happy St. Patrick's Day!


LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

3/14/2010

Five Good Leads From Confession

Inside A Catholic Confessional
Who Is Nookie Green
As the custom is in Ireland, every Saturday morning, the entire congregation makes their way to confession to cleanse their souls to prepare for Sunday mass. The priest enters his side of the confessional and waits for the first sinner to enter. A moment later he hears the door open and a voice say...

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."
Father Flanagan, the Parrish priest recognized the voice as one of his altar boys and asked, "Tis that you little Sean O'Malley?" Sean sheepishly replied, "Yes, Father, it is."
Father Flanagan pressed, "And who was this loose girl you were with then?"
Sean stated, "I cannot tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

Father Flanagan whispered back, "Well, Sean, I am sure to find out her name soon enough so you may as well tell me now. Was it Mary Rooney?"
Sean replied, "I cannot say."
Father Flanagan pressed further, "Was it Elizabeth Casey?"
Sean spoke, "I'll never tell Father."
Father asked, "Was it Patty Mulligan?"
Sean replied, "I'm sorry, but I cannot name her."
Father continued to press, "Was it Kathy Mannagan?"
Sean softly spoke, "My lips are sealed Father."
Once more, Father Flanagan asked, "Was it Rebecca Muldoon then?"
Sean coyly said, "Please, Father, I cannot tell you."

Father Flanagan sighed in frustration. He said, "You are a very tight lipped lad, and I admire that. But you have sinned and now you have to atone. Starting today, you will be relieved of your altar boy duties for four months. Now go back to your pew and say ten Hail Marys and ten Our Fathers."

Sean slowly walks back to his pew and his friend Mike slides over and whispered, "What'd you get?" Sean whispered, "Four months vacation and five good leads."


Happy St. Patrick's Day!


LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

3/13/2010

Chicago River Dyed Green

Chicago River Dyed Green For St. Patricks Day
Chicago River Dyed Green For St. Patricks Day
Every year since 1961, for the St. Patrick's Day parade, the city dyes the Chicago river green. Today the river turned green at approximately 10:45am. Members of the Journeymen Plumbers Union add a highly secretive blend of special dye and with a wee bit of assistance by a band of Leprechauns, dyes the river for the day.

But what's in this so-called highly secretive blend of dye? For starters, the dye is orange, one of three colors of Ireland's flag. As the dye is poured into the river, it magically transforms into the bright Irish green. The rest will have to be left to the imagination. City officials have stated that the dye is non toxic and environmentally safe to the fish and ecosystem but still guard the actual ingredients close to their vest.

See the boat in the river. Take a close look at the back of the boat. Yeah, that's the Grassy Knoll Institute LOTGK logo. Yeah, we're everywhere!


Happy St. Patrick's Day!


LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

3/12/2010

Guinness Brewery Gets New CEO

The Guinness Beer company, Ireland's famous brewing facility, named a new tough as nails C.E.O. to steer the company out of it's economic down turn. The New CEO, Robert Flanagan, was determined to tighten the belt of the corporation and rid the company of all the slackers not pulling their weight.

On his first day on the job touring the facility, he noticed a lad leaning lazily on the wall. He looked around and saw the room was full of employees and he thought to himself that this was a perfect opportunity to show everyone that he meant business.

The CEO walked up to the lad leaning on the wall and sternly asked, "And how much money do you make in a weeks time sir?" The young lad looked up nonchalantly and replied, "I make $200.00 a week. Why?" The CEO reached into his pocket and took out a wad of money and counted out $200.00 so everyone could see. He then turned to the lad and screamed, "Here's a weeks pay then, now GET OUT and don't come back!"

Feeling pretty good about firing his first employee for slacking on the job, he looked around the room and asked, "Can anyone tell me what that slacker did here?"

Out from the back of the room, one of the young workers muttered. "He's the pizza delivery guy!"


Happy St. Patrick's Day!


LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

3/09/2010

Lost Update - The Teacher


Lost Update - Season Six - 03/09/2010


Well the dawn was coming,
heard him ringing on my bell.
He said, ``My name's the teacher,
that is what I call myself.
And I have a lesson
that I must impart to you.
It's an old expression
but I must insist it's true.

Jump up, look around,
find yourself some fun,
no sense in sitting there hating everyone.
No man's an island and his castle isn't home,
the nest is for nothing when the bird has flown.''

So I took a journey,
threw my world into the sea.
With me went the teacher
who found fun instead of me.

Hey man, what's the plan, what was that you said?
Sun-tanned, drink in hand, lying there in bed.
I try to socialize but I can't seem to find
what I was looking for, got something on my mind.

Then the teacher told me
it had been a lot of fun.
Thanked me for his ticket
and all that I had done.

Hey man, what's the plan, what was that you said?
Sun-tanned, drink in hand, lying there in bed.
I try to socialize but I can't seem to find
what I was looking for, got something on my mind.


Lucifer was one of the most beautiful angels in all of heaven. So much so that he believed he could rival the Lord and plotted against him with a band of other recruited angels. God banished Lucifer to the pits of Hell for all eternity and turned him into an ugly offensive beast. Ever since the dawn of time Lucifer has been scheming to break free from Hell and return to Heaven to claim what we most desired. The kingdom of Heaven.

Throughout history, there are stories of great men and women being tempted by Lucifer during their time of weakness. Lucifer would promise what they so desired most. (Money, power, love, revenge) Some resisted, some did not. Even Jesus himself was tempted by Lucifer while he fasted in the desert for 40 days. Lucifer mocked Jesus telling him to rise up and end his own suffering and take a drink of water and to strike down the Roman guard readying to crucify him. Jesus resisted.

I'm telling you this bible story because it runs parallel with the last several episodes of Lost. MIB is Lucifer, the angel cast out of Heaven into the pits of Hell. (The island) He recruits an army of followers to overthrow the temple, (Heaven) leaving all others dead. He promises candidates what they so most desire to gain their allegiance. He even mocks Jacob, (Jesus) claiming what he does is a waste of time. And why does MIB (Lucifer) do all this? To get off the island.

There is your shout out to all the religion theorists, believing that the castaways are all dead, or in purgatory, or hell and need to prove themselves for redemption to move on.

However, that isn't what's happening on the island. My theory is far from this theory. Although, it can be easily incorporated as one of the many variables and scenario's being simultaneously being played out on the island.

Just what is the Grassy Knoll Institutes Lost theory….I’ve been waiting since Genesis to tell you…..
Although it appears the survivors of Oceanic flight 815 are on a tropical island, they are being deceived. There is no island. The survivors are in a virtual reality laboratory. All the castaways are interconnected to one another sharing each others thoughts, memories, and feelings. While in this virtual reality laboratory, a battery of physical and mental experiments are performed on them. And who is running these experiments? As Juliet stated, the Aliens of course.

Tonight's episode is a continuation of the final conflict, an epic battle between good and evil. The Rapture comes to mind here, (Yet another bible reference) where the line is drawn in the sand. The good on the right, the evil on the left. How you choose is critical to your human life and your spiritual soul. Case in point, when MIB entered the temple as smoky. He killed all those who opposed him and gathered the rest as reluctant followers.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the island, the good side of the island, Llana, Ben, Sun, Lapedus, Miles, Hurley, Jack, and Richard were setting up camp at the site of the original crash of Oceanic 815.

Folks, this is all an experiment, a test of human nature. Conducted under the shroud of virtual reality. Unwilling and unknowing participants believing what they see and fell is real. In essence, a perfect laboratory where exact data can be recorded and studied. In this scenario, drawing from deep rooted religious beliefs, God, Lucifer, heaven, Hell, the after life, the castaways are pitted against each other in a battle of good and evil. On one side, MIB, (Lucifer) will take the charge against the good (Followers of Jacob) in a winner take all struggle to the death.

Imagine if you will a young adult playing Xbox 360. After playing the same game for awhile, he becomes good at the game, he adapts to the surroundings, anticipates the computers next move, and easily defeats the game. However, when he reloads the game and dials the skill level up a notch, the game becomes much harder, with more surprises. The castaways have been in this continuous loop for a long time. They know how to play the game. Case in point. Jack with Richard while the fuse is burning toward the dynamite. He tells Richard he will not die. He knows the game. He sees the end game. He knows this is not how it ends.

The virtual reality tests have conditioned the castaways readying them for this final epic battle. Each scenario previous was dialed up a notch until they are now all at expert level. What comes next is pure human instinct. Survival. At what cost! Will the castaways murder in cold blood to survive? Will they murder loved ones in order to stay alive? That is the end game folks. Level 9, and the ones who survive, win the game.

Tidbits From Tonight's Episode:

* Ben teaches about Elba, the island Napolean was banished to after the war. He kept the title of Emperor but without power, titles meant nothing.

*Sun is a candidate.

* Miles gives up Ben to Llana stating Ben killed Jacob.

* Llana is pissed. Chains Ben to the ground and makes him dig his own grave.

* Richard tells Jack he was touched by Jacob and received a great gift.

* He tells Jack that he needs to go and die. Runs off into the jungle.

* Richard tells Jack he cannot kill himself. Exactly what happened to Michael. Michael tried to kill himself many times but always failed.

* Richard is dejected, said he followed Jacob for many many years. That jacob told him he had a plan, and that richard fit into the plan. That things were happening for a reason. But now Jacob is dead and his life is useless.

* Jack lights the dynamite, telling Hurley, if he wants to die, so be it.

* The fuse burns out just as Jack had predicted earlier.

* MIB frees Ben, tells him to come to the Hydra station.

* MIB tells Ben to shoot Llana with the rifle. He does not.

* All Ben wants is to be loved..... And to have all the power of the island once again.

* Ben in his sideways flash, does not betray Alex as he had on the island. Instead, he changes her fate, and his, for the good.

* The sub arrives, Widmore looks pissed.

Until next week, Get Lost!


LURKING, STILL LOST ON THE GRASSY KNOLL