Five Good Leads From Confession

Who Is Nookie Green

As the custom is in Ireland, every Saturday morning, the entire congregation makes their way to confession to cleanse their souls to prepare for Sunday mass. The priest enters his side of the confessional and waits for the first sinner to enter. A moment later he hears the door open and a voice say...

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."
Father Flanagan, the Parrish priest recognized the voice as one of his altar boys and asked, "Tis that you little Sean O'Malley?" Sean sheepishly replied, "Yes, Father, it is."
Father Flanagan pressed, "And who was this loose girl you were with then?"
Sean stated, "I cannot tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

Father Flanagan whispered back, "Well, Sean, I am sure to find out her name soon enough so you may as well tell me now. Was it Mary Rooney?"
Sean replied, "I cannot say."
Father Flanagan pressed further, "Was it Elizabeth Casey?"
Sean spoke, "I'll never tell Father."
Father asked, "Was it Patty Mulligan?"
Sean replied, "I'm sorry, but I cannot name her."
Father continued to press, "Was it Kathy Mannagan?"
Sean softly spoke, "My lips are sealed Father."
Once more, Father Flanagan asked, "Was it Rebecca Muldoon then?"
Sean coyly said, "Please, Father, I cannot tell you."

Father Flanagan sighed in frustration. He said, "You are a very tight lipped lad, and I admire that. But you have sinned and now you have to atone. Starting today, you will be relieved of your altar boy duties for four months. Now go back to your pew and say ten Hail Marys and ten Our Fathers."

Sean slowly walks back to his pew and his friend Mike slides over and whispered, "What'd you get?" Sean whispered, "Four months vacation and five good leads."


Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Back To St. Patricks Day Archives

LURKING, ERIN GOES BRALESS ON THE GRASSY KNOLL