Showing posts with label hoax. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hoax. Show all posts

11/05/2007

And Jupiter Aligns With Mars

And Jupiter Aligns With Mars
The recent bizarre weather patterns, or lack there of have not gone unnoticed at the Grassy Knoll Institute. Since the onset of winter in December of 2002, the seasons seem to be blurring together. This winter in the states, the weather was much more severe than in many years past. It seemed to snow almost every day and the temperature was constantly below freezing. As spring began to blossom, the same strange pattern occurred. Precipitation.

Yes, it usually rains in spring, but the rainfall was far above the average and the temperature remained unseasonably cooler than normal. The same pattern as spring gave way to summer. It rained constantly. More precipitation than in years past and the temperature was at least 10 degrees cooler than normal.

Many cities and towns were deluged with what is referred to as “The hundred year rain cycle" flooding streets, rivers cresting, and destruction of property in the hundreds of millions of dollars. This not only happened once, but twice in less than three weeks time. Two ferocious storm patterns with the intensity of the hundred-year rain wreaked havoc causing F.E.M.A. to take action declaring many states disaster area’s after the second storm hit.

Heavy rainstorm systems are not the only peculiar events this season. These storm systems have produced more tornadoes and hurricanes so far this year than ever before recorded in history.

Earthquakes have also increased during the same time period with many dormant fault zones becoming alive again with tremors registering sizable movement and damage.

As strange as it sounds, volcano eruptions have increased in the same time frame and the famed Yellowstone National Park also showed a huge jump in seismic activity leading scientists to believe that this hot bed area will soon erupt and change the landscape of Yellowstone. The last large eruption in Yellowstone was approximately 60,000 years ago and it is due for another gigantic eruption.

The Grassy Knoll Institute has been analyzing all these strange patterns and has come to the realization that there is no conspiracy coverup involved even as some rumors abound about the Government conducting weather altering experiments actually being able to control the weather as they see fit. To this theory, the Grassy Knoll Institute simply says...BULL.

There is a much simpler yet deadlier explanation to the strange weather patterns. One simply needs to look into the night sky for the answer. Search for the moon in the sky. Now, look to the right of the moon. Do you see that bright red shining object? The object that wasn’t visible to the naked eye a mere month ago. That object is the planet Mars. The fourth planet from the sun, our celestial neighbor, and it has come to pay us a visit.

On the 27th of August in 2003, Mars was the closest to Earth than it ever has been in the past 60,000 years. The planet Mars for the next 10 years will become "Close" neighbors with Earth. Approximately every 60,000 years Mars orbit moves in a much nearer approach towards Earth and will continue to be visible in the night sky until late October 2013. Coincidentally, the last time Yellowstone Park had a gigantic eruption was 60,000 years ago. Coincidence, the Grassy Knoll Institute thinks not.

The Grassy Knoll Institute believes Mars is the cause for the strange weather patterns we are having all around the globe? Mars is changing our seasons as it comes closer to the Earth? Mars is cooling the oceans creating weather changes turning dry areas into wetlands?

Does Mars have this power? When we look at the moon and the power it has over our oceans causing high and low tides with it’s gravitational pull, one would tend to believe that a planet the size of Mars would also have an effect on our oceans that determine out weather conditions. Mars, like the moon, has tremendous gravitational pull and with the combined pull of both the moon and Mars on our tectonic plates near earthquake fault lines, certainly the increase of earthquakes and tremors throughout the world can be attributed to this.

Beginning on the 28th, August 2003, Mars slowly began to start to move away distancing itself back to its regular orbit of more than 30 million miles away. This move will take up to ten years. The speed in which Mars returns to its orbit will be gradual ensuring an early fall season and a harsh, wet and cold winter. This pattern will continue for 10 years.

Epilogue:

Perhaps 50 million years ago, the dinosaurs looked up and gazed upon a strange light in the sky. Perhaps Mars inched even closer to Earth that time. Perhaps close enough to change the entire globes climate, sending the Earth into an ice age sealing the fate of the dinosaur. The Grassy Knoll Institute will keep its eyes focused skyward.




LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL

10/17/2007

Princess Diana Is Still Alive

Empirical Evidence That Princess Diana Is Still Alive
The above photo is empirical evidence that Diana, the Princess of Wales, faked her death to get out of her marriage to Prince Charles and to cut ties with the Queen Mother. Diana was rumored to be pregnant and the father certainly wasn't Charles.

This photo was taken eight months after Diana tragically died in a brutal car crash. Apparently, she is healing quite nicely and will soon be able to pursue her life in peace. Away from the media hounds, away from Charles, and away from the Queen.

You be the judge...



LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL


10/10/2007

Rockers Elvis And Morrison Are Alive


Elvis Presley And Jim Morrison Are Alive
Elvis Presley And Jim Morrison Are Alive
Grassy Knoll Institute Breaking News

The original king of rock and roll, Elvis Presley and the original bad boy of rock, Jim Morrison have been spotted and identified living on a farm in a remote area in Nebraska.

Elvis Is The One Wearing The Hat.
An elaborate plan and hoax helped Elvis stage his own death so he could live out the rest of his life doing what he always wanted. Being a farmer in Nebraska and eating all the chili fries he wanted.

I Need An L.A. Woman!
After years of living the rock star life, Jim Morrison has been reduced to a brittle old man needing canes to get around with.


LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL