Showing posts with label release the kracken. Show all posts
Showing posts with label release the kracken. Show all posts

9/13/2009

Release The Kracken

The Stink Bomb!
This particular brand of stink bomb doesn't do the word "Stink" justice. When you break the vial an unbearable stench fills the air in a matter of seconds and lingers for 20-30 minutes. To flee the vicinity is the only recourse to save yourself. Hence, the stink bomb is strictly forbidden at the secret lair of the Grassy Knoll Institute.

A little while ago one rocket scientist (Joe) had a pack of stink bombs on his desk. He was playfully threatening the other employees saying he was going to break one of those puppies open and throw it at random workers passing by unless someone went to get lunch for him for a change. (No one went for him)

After about 20 minutes of this, (Yes, we were all working really hard at the secret lair of the Grassy Knoll Institute that day) a very high level executive walked into Joe's office and grabbed one of the stink bombs and smashed it on Joe's desk and ran out laughing. Seconds later the stench wafted through the office and everyone was covering their nose and screaming. Big industrial fans were positioned to slowly pull the stench out of the office. (Joe decided to go to lunch. "Hey Joe, can you pick me up something since you're going to be out!")

A memo came out the next day banning stink bombs from the office forever. However, just the other day a certain Curator strategically placed a stink bomb under the toilet seat in the Men's room and then gingerly put the seat down. I then exited and waited for an unlucky victim.

Within minutes the Kracken (The stink bomb glass was broken releasing the vile liquid) was released and the bathroom filled up with the unbearable stench. Like a scene from the science fiction 1950's movie, "The Blob," people were running away from the bathroom and hallway seeking safety.

The next day yet another memo was issued stating, "We really mean it this time, no more stink bombs permitted at the secret lair of the Grassy Knoll Institute.

Business as usual. :D




LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL