Black Friday Thought Screen Helmet |
Black Friday is a good day for aliens to abduct you. Be prepared!
For being a bad man, and not following the instructions causing the construction of an improper thought screen helmet, Billy banished Ned to the cornfield for good.
Disclaimer: Don't let what happened to Ned happen to you. Your lifestyle and job does not have to suffer from the fear of alien abduction. You can learn how to construct your very own authentic thought screen helmet lined with velostat (A magical material that cancels telepathic emissions) that will effectively eliminate 100% of the telepathic transmissions from the aliens attempting to control your thoughts. Don't be wished out to the corn field. Act today!
For being a bad man, and not following the instructions causing the construction of an improper thought screen helmet, Billy banished Ned to the cornfield for good.
Disclaimer: Don't let what happened to Ned happen to you. Your lifestyle and job does not have to suffer from the fear of alien abduction. You can learn how to construct your very own authentic thought screen helmet lined with velostat (A magical material that cancels telepathic emissions) that will effectively eliminate 100% of the telepathic transmissions from the aliens attempting to control your thoughts. Don't be wished out to the corn field. Act today!
LURKING ON THE GRASSY KNOLL
rest assured... i'm protected!
ReplyDeleteI knew that you would be. This is a public service to those who are not in the know....
ReplyDeleteThere are no such thing as space aliens, let alone space aliens using telepathy to control citizens minds and actions. I know, for I am the one who orchestrated this hoax to deflect suspicion on me. I am only now revealing this for my mission is complete. I got what I wanted and left utter chaos for those believing they are being contacted by aliens.
ReplyDeleteLex, The Worlds Greatest Criminal Mind.
No one ever listens to you grassy one. If only they did, alien abduction would be reduced by over 50%.
ReplyDeleteOh the humanity!
And just what was your mission? Any insight?
ReplyDeleteWell, maybe not 50%, but perhaps 40-45 percent.
ReplyDelete:D
That explains the wig Lex has been wearing all these years.
ReplyDeleteHe knew the invasion was coming. He prepared for it.
ReplyDelete