Grassy Knoll Institute

4/01/2008

Nude Gymnast On Las Vegas BLVD

I was in Las Vegas last week for the Halloween Trade show hosted at the Sands Exposition convention. While on my way to work one morning, I snapped this photo of a naked gymnast doing her Olympic routine. I must admit, she was very good. she had a fabulous routine and stuck her dismount perfectly.

However, the French judge on the scene was not impressed and awarded her the bronze medal.

Goddamn French judges!!!

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Wordpress March 2008 Wrap-Up

Wordpress March 2008 Wrap up by none other than WP's own blog extraordinaire Keymaster Matt:

March came in like a lion and went out like a lamb. Winter is over and more than warmer weather is in store for Wordpress.

In the month of March on Wordpress:

25,245,329 blogs were created. (Thats up 85%)
2,432,478 new users joined. (Up 245% from last month)
11,920,593 file uploads. (A mind boggling statistic)
22,814,893 posts and 21,996,427 new pages. (And two cherry sno-cones)
544,961,330 comments. (With 50% of them stating, "Way cool blog dude.")
423,813,432 logins. (With 32% of them non-human log ins)
74,540,799,534 pageviews on WordPress.com, and another 1,304,499,648 on self-hosted blogs. (Thats a hell of a lot of taco's.)
1,726,789 active blogs in February, where “active” means they got a human visitor. (Trolls were counted as a half visitor slightly skewing results)

For more than two years now, Wordpress bloggers have been lighting up the WP forums pleading for more add-ons to be made available to them including scripts. Well, today is your lucky day WP'ers.

Wordpress has listened. Beginning tomorrow, WP will introduce several selected fully functional Chat Boards approved by the Keymasters of WP. A tagboard widgit will appear on your Tool Bar Manage page that you will need to customize and install.

But that's not all. WP management is excited to announce a new contest on the forums for the most wanted script widgit. The widgit with the most votes will be rewritten by WP tech heads and rolled out by the end of April for all to use.

WP management promises to roll out several more scripts and widgits by the end of 2008.

Until next months wrap-up.

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Zombama And Hellary In 2008

Introducing Every Republican's Nightmare!

To combat the popular Republican party nominee John McCain, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton have put their differences aside and teamed together as a united Democratic presidential nomination for 2008.

Upon accepting the nomination, Barack thanked his spiritual leader for the guidance, wisdom and contributions to his campaign as he moved forward in his determination to fix the problems of the country.

Hillary only had this to say about the nomination. There will be hell to pay. That's right, I'm a bitch, deal with it.

Brought to you by Morbid Industries, leading Halloween props and costumes company.

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3/31/2008

Colonel Sanders Alive And Well

This just in!

Colonel Sanders, Kentucky Fried Chicken founder and icon of the fast food restaurant, dead for over 20 years, was photographed today shaking George Clooney's hand during a red carpet Hollywood event.

Apparently Sanders faked his death and has been living large in the great state of Montana with Jim Morrison, Elvis, and D.B. Cooper.

Rumor was that Elvis paid a kings ransom to fake Sanders death because he couldn't live without the secret recipe fried chicken dinners.

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Putting On My Jester Hat

Tomorrow is April 1st. And that means it's also April Fools Day which just happens to be the Grassy Knoll Institutes "Feast Day!" It is the one day out of the year that we get serious with current events and news stories.

I have already pulled out my Jester hat, (My wife Patty says its the same hat I wear every day) (I think in a way she is calling me a fool) and I am ready to deliver the news as only the Curator can. Some of you have made the news. Some I have had mercy on. And some I tread ever so lightly with.

Either way, the updates begin at midnight EST, and will continue until midnight tomorrow. (Thats 24 hours for those keeping score at home)

It is in your best interest to click here:

April Fools Day Archives to keep abreast of all the breaking news as this site will be updating at least once an hour beginning at 8am (I need some sleep people, I am not an animal, I am a human being) with at least 20 updates. Twenty one if you are in Vegas.

And remember, I am only the Curator. If you have a complaint, please email the (Lead Scientist) and let him have it with both barrels.

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3/28/2008

Apple Barn Restaurant - Chicken Strip Dinner - Gatlinburg

Apple Barn Chicken Strip Dinner

Right to the main course this time. The Apple Barn restaurant was a favorite place of mine in Pigeon Forge. Imagine my delight when they opened one right on the strip in Gatlinburg. It looks exactly the same outside and inside of the original restaurant. And the food and service, yes, just the same. Excellent.

As you can see, I ordered the fried chicken planks with all the fixins. The chicken was golden brown and tasted excellent. An ample portion was served. You were not going away hungry from this restaurant.

Also with the main course was a baked potato with real butter, a bowl of macaroni and cheese, which was creamy and delicious, and a hot fresh roll with butter.

Apple Barn Menu

Of course, this is the menu, which was clean and easy to read. I hate receiving a menu that has dirt or crud on it. It makes me suspect the food they are preparing in the kitchen. If the menu is dirty, more than likely so is the food.

Apple Barn Apple Fritters

Brought out first were the apple fritters and juice along with several rolls with jelly and butter. Not wanting to fill up before the main course, I only had one.

Apple Barn Chicken Noodle Soup

Although the picture is a little out of focus, the chicken noodle soup was right on. It tasted like home made, with big noodles and chunks of chicken and carrots in a thick broth all steaming hot. A cold, crisp coke completed the meal.

Over all, the waitress was very friendly, helpful, and professional. We were seated quite quickly, and on a busy evening, that doesn't happen all the time. The cost was very reasonable, about 15 dollars before tip.

The Grassy Knoll Institute awards 4.5 out of 5 shots to the Apple Barn restaurant and recommends eating lunch and dinner there.

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3/19/2008

Welcome To Fabulous Las Vegas

Welcome back Curator of the Grassy Knoll Institute

I'm on my way once again to fabulous Las Vegas for yet another business trip. While the lead scientist is finishing up his business in Florida, I am heading West to the neon desert.

And look, Las Vegas knows I'm coming....

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